


Revv 'Em Up

by Actually_Ichimatsu



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Abuse, Alexs inhumane work ethics, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, College AU, Derogatory Language, F/F, Fear of Germs, Gay, Germophobia, Graphic Suicide Attempt, Hinted sexual content, Homophobia, James is a WEEABOO, M/M, Many different Fandoms make a brief appearance, Memes, Not Really Mentioned Though, Oh also idk yet, Oh i should change the tags, Panic Attacks, Roasting, Short chaps due to writing on phone, Suicide Attempt, Swearing, Texting, Trans Male Character, Transphobia, Underage Drinking, a train wreck, alex hating on tjeffs, but - Freeform, but maybe nb laf, chatfic, douche, idk its not brought up (yet), idk they dont care abt pronouns in this, incorrect usage of acronyms, james reynolds is a douce, messaging, some violence, the graphic depictions tag is just in case, trans!alex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-10-19 11:22:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 17,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10638816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Actually_Ichimatsu/pseuds/Actually_Ichimatsu
Summary: Yet another Chatfic, since they never get old ;)))Or in otherwords, alex is a gay mess, and so is most of the crew





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Alex: adotfiteme  
> John: heckingturtles  
> Peggy: alcoholism  
> Angelica: unsatisfied  
> Eliza: Elizard  
> Herc: disneyownsme  
> Laf: honhonbagette  
> Tjeff: macaronifucker  
> Mads: praying4death  
> Martha Washington: washingmom  
> George Washington: washingdad  
> Aaron: aaronymous  
> Maria Reynolds: mdygh
> 
> In otherwords: i love paining myself by pushing myself out my comfort zone and this may turn out horrible/angsty
> 
> Once again, unbeta'd
> 
> Thanks for putting up with me!

adotfiteme added disneyownsme, heckingturtles, & honhonbaguette to this group

adotfiteme renamed this group "revv em up"

 

adotfiteme sent a file: "VROOMVROOM.jpg"

disneyownsme: pardon my french but what the FUCK

honhonbaguette: that isnt french tho

heckingturtles: HOLLUP LET ME GET EVERYONE ELSE

  
heckingturtles added alcoholism, aaronymous, macaronifucker, mdygh, Elizard, unsatisfied, washingdad & washingmom to this group

heckingturtles: WAIT NO I DIDNT MEAN TO ADD TJEFFS

adotfiteme: A JEFFERSON? IN MY CHAT??? ITS MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK

adotfiteme: NONETHELESS GET OUT

macaronifucker: jesus christ why are yall so mean to me

adotfiteme removed macaronifucker from this group

mdygh: hey

adotfiteme: who is that

alcoholism: its my favorite lookalike, maria

adotfiteme: why is ur name like that

mdygh: I DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO MAKE MY NAME SO I JUST SLAMMED MY HANDS AGAINST THE KEYBOARD AND HIT ENTER

aaronymous: same

adotfiteme: why did i never get maria's skype im so HURT : (((

mdygh: im sorry : (((

adotfiteme: :,(((((

Elizard: yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

adotfiteme: yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

alcoholism: thank u john for addin me, instead of forgetting me //glare

adotfiteme: THAT WAS ONE TIME YOU ALL ARE B U L L Y I N G ME

disneyownsme: thank god for peg being here we needed a good memer

adotfiteme: YALL BETTER ST O P N O W

unsatisfied: did alex just

alcoholism: screenshotted, posted on my snacessanger.ly

honhonbaguette: mon petite lion, i believe you are becoming more alike to jefferson by the day

adotfiteme left the group

heckingturtles added adotfiteme to this group

adotfiteme: i regretted leaving as soon as i left oh no

unsatisfied: why

adotfiteme: NO ONE HAS ADMIN RIGHTS ANYMORE SO IF SOMEONES ADDED I CANT REMOVE THEM

alcoholism: oh really---

adotfiteme: hoe dont dont do it

alcoholism added macaronifucker & praying4death to this group

adotfiteme: oh my god

macaronifucker: why am i back

adotfiteme: jefferson please leave for all things good and holy

macaronifucker: its good im wanted here hm

praying4death: i enjoy you here

elizard: thats GAY

disneyownsme: is no one going to say anything about 'snacessanger.ly'

elizard: nah

macaronifucker: whats that

aaronymous: instagram

alcoholism: instagram

aaronymous: oh

alcoholism: oh

macaronifucker: oh

praying4death: oh

honhonbaguette: oh

disneyownsme: oh

heckingturtles: oh

mdygh: oh

praying4death: oh

washingmom: Oh.

honhonbaguette: MRS. WASHINGTON WHEN DID YOU GET HERE???

disneyownsme: why did we add our professors wife

washingmom: I just came here when Aaron and Peggy said instagram at the same time

alcoholism: hi Mrs. Washington!!

washingmom: hello dear

macaronifucker: i want to REST

praying4death: so do i

macaronifucker: wanna ;;;)))) come over and iunno watch a movie

praying4death: sure want me to stop at a KFC for macncheese

macaronifucker: yes thank u xxxx

alcoholism: i wish i had a relationship as good as jeffmads

honhonbaguette: rt

mdygh: rt

disneyownsme: rt

unsatisfied: rt

heckingturtles: rt

unsatisfied: um excuse me you have a beautiful boyfriend

heckingturtles: i wish we could do gay stuff like that in public : (

washingdad: good evening

heckingturtles: HELLO MR. WASHINGTON

washingdad: hello John

elizard: i just thought 'man alex would say smth like 'oh no gwash is here'' and i realized- where did my gay son go

aaronymous: gwash

alcoholism: gwash

aaronymous: could you not

alcoholism: could you NOT

unsatisfied: its time to STOP

heckingturtles: my boyfriend left me and our 4 children and i miss him

elizard: rt

disneyownsme: in all reality hes probably either passed out or he's working on something due months from now lbh

washingmom: lbh?

mdygh: idk probably lesbian's butt hurt

disneyownsme: no what-

alcoholism: no it means limb bud and heart development which is a protein coding gene

disneyownsme: NO, thats INCORRECT

honhonbaguette: it means, how you say, lets be honest

disneyownsme: the how you say was completely unnecessary laf

honhonbaguette: that is, how you say, rude of you to say

disneyownsme: i give

  
Sunday 3:47 AM

adotfiteme: my phone died while i was doing a paper what did i miss


	2. Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex meets the Best Coffee Maker in NYC, but thats just about the only good thing today

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You thought it was gonna be all happy? Nope i cant do that sorry
> 
> NOTE: unless for some reason i change my mind noones gonna die because i have read fics where that happens and it makes me too sad so : ((( dont wanna do that to yall
> 
> Also i recently became trash for In the Heights take notice of the lowkey references besides the obvious ones
> 
> and:  
> Alex: adotfiteme  
> John: heckingturtles  
> Peggy: alcoholism  
> Angelica: unsatisfied  
> Eliza: Elizard  
> Herc: disneyownsme  
> Laf: honhonbagette  
> Tjeff: macaronifucker  
> Mads: praying4death  
> Martha Washington: washingmom  
> George Washington: washingdad  
> Aaron: aaronymous  
> Maria Reynolds: mdygh (She doesnt appear in this chapter but theres a reason)

Tuesday, 12:43pm  
"revv em up"

adotfiteme: so I found the best coffee holy shit

alcoholism: ??? Where tell me

Elizard: PEGGY YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE IN SCHOOL????

alcoholism: dont you have a class in ten minutes Eliza

Elizard:

Elizard: FUCK BYE

alcoholism: anyway go on

adotfiteme: so im always searching for a good cafe and i was further uptown because idk i dont have anything to do today??

adotfiteme: i was asking around

adotfiteme: and someone says "hey Usnavi's bodega is right around the corner" and they give me the place

adotfiteme: and I go in there and its pretty small and order and it was SO GOOD

adotfiteme: I cried a little

alcoholism: you're gonna have to show me the place soon

adotfiteme: maybe i will

unsatisfied: please dont or if you do take me with you

adotfiteme: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

honhonbaguette: WE SHOULD ALL PLAN A TRIP THERE

honhonbaguette: ALL OF US

macaronifucker: um could yall not some of U S HAVE CLASSES TODAY

adotfiteme: fuck you thomas

 

Tuesday, 2:36pm  
adotfiteme >>> Elizard

adotfiteme: Are you out of class?

Elizard: um yeah why do you ask

adotfiteme: I'm afraid I'm in a predicament, and stuck in a bathroom in a store's bathroom.

Elizard: ill be right there where is it??

 

Tuesday, 3:01pm  
"revv em up"

  
Elizard: imma kill someone bail me out

  
Tuesday, 3:02pm  
adotfiteme >>> Elizard

adotfiteme: I'm fine Eliza. It doesnt really matter..

Elizard: it does youre right beside me and youre not talking to me and youre worrying me

adotfiteme: Where are we even going?

Elizard: my apartment, i dont have a class until like 6pm

adotfiteme: Is it okay if I leaned on you

Elizard: yeah of course

  
Tuesday, 4:02pm  
"revv em up"

unsatisfied: WHAT HAPPENED WHO MADE MY BABY SISTER ANGry???

unsatisfied: im sorry i just got out of class

Elizard: come to my apartment please (lex are you okay with that?)

Elizard: lex says thats okay so yeah come over

unsatisfied: whys Alexander at your place

Elizard: later idk if lex wants me to say

unsatisfied: i'll be right over

Elizard: you dont have another class today right

Elizard: I have a class at six

unsatisfied: yeah I'll stay with him

disneyownsme: whats going on???

honhonbaguette: ^

heckingturtles: IS MY BABY OKAY???

Elizard: it wasnt a good idea to text in the chat right

 

_> >>Alexander's Phone_

**> >Missed Calls (4)**  
John <333 (2)  
Laf  
Herc

**> Messaging (15)**  
From: John <333 (8)  
-Baby are you okay?  
-what happened?  
-I saw the chat and like are you okay im sorry i probably sound annoying  
-i love you baby boy  
-please respond when you get time i love you  
-[attached image] Im gonna send you pics that might help  
-[2 attached images]

From: laf (2)  
-mon ami, is everything alright?  
-mon petite lion?

From: Herc (1)  
-Im not very good with this but is everything okay? Everyones worried Johns lost his head please say something when you get time! Hope you feel better

From: A-A-ron (1)  
-what are you doing

From: Mom (2)  
-darling, its me, is everything alright? George cant text you because hes teaching a class but he'll text you soon, we love you very much, please stay safe!  
-[attached picture]

From: Dad (1)  
-I just got out of teaching a class son, are you alright? Did you get hurt? Please be safe.

**Skype (14)**

(He opens up the Skype appication.)

 

Tuesday, 8:54pm  
"revv em up"

adotfiteme: um hey

heckingturtles: BABE ARE YOU OKAY???

adotfiteme: please dont yell at me

heckingturtles: oh im so sorry lex sorry

heckingturtles: ive just been really worried are you alright?

adotfiteme: yeah im as fine as I can be

adotfiteme: I have an Idea™ give me a moment.

 

adotfiteme added alcoholism, disneyownsme, elizard, heckingturtles, honhonbaguette & unsatisfied to this group

adotfiteme renamed this group to "alexander and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day"

adotfiteme: so since the others dont know im, trans* and i feel we should keep that chat for the most part positive im just gonna yeah here

adotfiteme: so um basically i went to a like. Clothing store and um

adotfiteme: ive been on my um yeah and still ive been trying to pass and so im in pain and cant breathe already

adotfiteme: so this attendant walks up to me and says

adotfiteme: (i dont blame her though i dont pass well)

adotfiteme: "what are you looking for mam?"

adotfiteme: and i ran into their one bathroom and locked myself in until eliza could get me

adotfiteme: ive been with eliza and angelica since and eliza came back shortly with some food

adotfiteme: im sorry to worry everyone over something so stupid it was dumb i just

Elizard: Alex, it wasnt dumb, you were a mess when i got there and maybe even if she didnt mean it it wasnt nice of her to assume like that

heckingturtles: Im so sorry baby,,, im sorry i wasnt there!! I wouldve fought her

adotfiteme: its not a big deal

heckingturtles: if youre still a mess over it im sure it was

adotfiteme: its just me beinf sensitive its dumb,,

alcoholism: are you any better now?

adotfiteme: i'll be fine by morning, im pretty exhausted right now

adotfiteme: im prolly just gonna sleep, good night

honhonbaguette: i just read over, and that really sucks god i really hope you feel better! Good night alex

disneyownsme: same

alcoholism: good night

heckingturtles: good night, i love you

  
9:04pm  
praying4death >>> Elizard

praying4death: um hi Eliza this is James Madison

Elizard: whats up?

praying4death: i wont ask what happened but is Hamilton okay? I saw something happened and I (and Thomas even know he doesnt admit it) are worried

Elizard: yeah he'll be okay by morning just something happened that upset him

praying4death: alright, ill see you around

Elizard: bye!

9:05pm  
"revv em up"

aaronymous: whats up

alcoholism: sent a photo "thedefinitionofup.jpeg"

aaronymous: : (

alcoholism: : )

macaronifucker: #peron

alcoholism: oh god no dont

aaronymous: ???

unsatisfied: WHY DO I COME BAXK TO SEE JERKERSON SHIPPING MY BABY SISTER WITH BURR

aaronymous: oh NO I DONT

alcoholism: IM GAY STOP THIS MADNESS

macaronifucker: what

alcoholism: what

macaronifucker: IM STILL UNSTOPPABLE IM STILL SHIPPING IT

heckingturtles: yall are f r e a k s

macaronifucker: ITS STILL HAPPENING

heckingturtles: you

Elizard: hey mads you here

praying4death: yeah

Elizard: give me his address

praying4death: y

Elizard: imma kill 'im

praying4death- k

praying4death sent a location to this chat

macaronifucker: YOU JUST SENT MY ADDRESS TO THE ENTIRE CHAT

praying4death: ^^

Elizard: imma be there less than 10 minutes

heckingturtles: im joinin >:)

macaronifucker: HAVE MERCY OTL

alcoholism: thats how James has you every night

macaronifucker: WHAT

praying4death: WHAT

alcoholism: HAHA REVENGE

  
Wednesday, 4:20am  
"Revv em up"

honhonbaguette changed their name to bonbonhaguette

bonbonhaguette: >:)))))))))))))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And also like. This observes my HCs like its weird lex gets really um verbose when hes upset??
> 
> And also Usnavi will most likely NOT be in this fic besides by passing mention and ideas for a prompt thing ? Because i dont speak spanish i only speak inglês but next year ill be taking spanish dont worry maybe then


	3. In Which the Revolunary Squad + Pegster Go to the Greatest Coffee Place in All New York

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron is a 70s kid, Lex is a Mess ™, Peggy sees a school friend, and in which the plot thickens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex: adotfiteme  
> John: heckingturtles  
> Peggy: alcoholism  
> Angelica: unsatisfied  
> Eliza: Elizard  
> Herc: disneyownsme  
> Laf: bonbonhagette  
> Tjeff: macaronifucker  
> Mads: praying4death  
> Martha Washington: washingmom  
> George Washington: washingdad  
> Aaron: aaronymous  
> Maria Reynolds: mdygh (doesnt show up again prolly, next chapter ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )
> 
> Note: idk if ill be able to get one out next weekend, finals are starting next week and honestly im lazy as fuck and should be finishing my projects for the semester but im sorta sick
> 
> I digress, (say something so i dont stress ;)) ) lets go on :^))))

 

Friday, 10:36am  
"Revv em up"

heckingturtles: have you ever seen someone who looks exactly like alex on tv but he claims he did no acting

adotfiteme: ITS BECAUSE I DIDNT DO IT AND HE DOESNT LOOK LIKE ME HE HAS SHORT HAIR

Elizard: ???

heckingturtles: so we were on like idk a binge watching spree and someone from my class mentioned this show called Do Not Harm and that we might get a kick out of it

heckingturtles: it was Not An Excellent Show but there was this one GUY HIS NAME WAS RUBEN

heckingturtles: HE WAS SO CUTE

adotfiteme: he didnt deserve anything that happened to him tbh save him

heckingturtles: I KNOW

heckingturtles: wait

adotfiteme: oh no

aaronymous: oh, i think ive watched that once

aaronymous: i only watched like one episode

aaronymous: chemist guy was the bomb dot com tbh

aaronymous: idk the rest of the characters were just mediocre

unsatisfied: did you just say the bomv dot com

alcoholism: A A RON IS LITERALLY FROM THE 70S

alcoholism: bomv

unsatisfied: 70S

bonbonhaguette: bon bon haguette more like bon bon hangme

macaronifucker: ?? You okay there Lafayette

bonbonhaguette: MDNWHydum

bonbonhaguette: SOMEONE HAD MY PHONE

bonbonhaguette: NEMANDN

bonbonhaguette added mrth.lrns

mrth.lrns: im someone, hey

bonbonhaguette: HOW DARE YOU :(((

heckingturtles: why were you bugging laf martha

mrth.lrns changed their name to metha

metha: why not bug ur best friend and force them to add me darling ;)))))

metha:

metha: its been 20 minutes yall are rude

metha left the chat

praying4death: what just happened

alcoholism: why did tjeffs ask if laf was okay

adotfiteme: rt

macaronifucker: i cant worry about my doppleganger?

bonbonhaguette: WE'RE NOT THAT SIMILAR

adotfiteme: if im being honest you two really do look alike and i feel bad for laf for having to share the same face as him

macaronifucker: rude

adotfiteme: read my name

macaronifucker: okay but i have class in 5 minutes

adotfiteme: wait so do i fuck

heckingturtles: you know today is normal when you wake up after a long marathon, eat a granola bar for breakfast(lunch more like now tbh), then see alex zooming at top speed to get to class

 

Friday, 1:46pm

adotfiteme: i won that fight fuck you jefferson

adotfiteme: WAIT WAIT WAIT IS EVERYONE FREE FOR THE REST OF THE DAY

alcoholism: im free because school didnt happen today idk why

bonbonhaguette: i dont have classes on fridays

disneyownsme: I should be free in like. 15 minutes when this class ends

heckingturtles: you know me baby ;)

adotfiteme: REMMEBER THAT COFFEE SHOP IMTOLD YOU ABOUT A FEW DAYS AGO

alcoholism: that was like a few weeks ago but go on

adotfiteme: LETSGOLETSGOLETSG O

alcoholism: IM IN

heckingturtles: IM IN

bonbonhaguette: oui

disneyownsme: LETS G O FUCKERS

Friday, 2:31pm

heckingturtles: WOAH I COME UP HERE OFTEN??? The medical centre is like near here

disneyownsme: its center

heckingturtles: im british

disneyownsme: youre southern

heckingturtles: excuse me who did a semester abroad in england

bonbonhaguette: why arent we talking aloud

heckingturtles: lex is on a rant again

bonbonhaguette: right

bonbonhaguette: WOAH WOAH THIS ESCALATOR IS H UG E W O A H

adotfiteme: I KNOOOOOOOOOOOOO

alcoholism: woa its like i walked into a totally different city???????

alcoholism: why does that guy look exactly like you alex??????????????

alcoholism: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SAYINF ALEX

bonbonhaguette: spanish probably

alcoholism: SINCE WHEN DID YOU KNOW SPANISH FNMESVDHJ

heckingturtles: hes always??? Known it????

alcoholism: ????????

disneyownsme: i like this guy

alcoholism: HOLD UP

heckingturtles: I CANT BELIEVE FHIS

alcoholism: WHY IS S ONNY HERE

disneyownsme: this just in- peggy just hugged a k-pop kid

disneyownsme: sent a video: peggynboyinabodega.mp4

alcoholism: damn youre right this i s good coffee

adotfiteme: I AM NEVER WRO N G

alcoholism: hey lex

adotfiteme: ?????

alcoholism: exactly HOW MANY LANGUAGES ARE YOU FLUENT IN?

adotfiteme: well i know english ofc and french and spanish but also im almost fluent in latin??? Not super but u kno

alcoholism: GOD IS CRYING

adotfiteme: dios mio ;))))))

alcoholism: IM WE E P I N G

  
Saturday, 2:45 am

mdygh: plaes hlp em

mdygh: hse gnna kll m r

mdygh: plse imsorryhlep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i wrote the notes before i wrote this so i lied maria does show up minimally


	4. Bunch o' Angst but Its Gonna be Okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Screaming, sadness, and worry all wrapped up into one chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally have a killer headache? Idk?????????? Why do i do this???????? Anyway i felt i should double update incase nothin happens next weekend this is probably crappy i wrote it on a sleep deprived mind and ect ect excuses
> 
> Idk if youre gonna need any chat names like literally one person had their phone and its funny

Saturday, 2:46am  
"Revv em up"

heckingturtles: oh god alex just ran out i think hes running to your house Maria

mdygh: nonono dot let hum ckem here hes gonnna kill us boht oh no ononono

heckingturtles: maria, calm down, whats going on?

heckingturtles: maria?

.___.

Maria sat hidden away in the bathroom, anything movable blocked in front of the door.

Slamming against the door was her long term boyfriend, trying to get in. Screaming at her obscenities, screaming how he was going to kill was going to kill her. Maria sobbed

 _I dont want to die,_ she thought, _it hurts it hurts it hurts make it stop make it end I can't breathe and I think I'm dying and_

The door began to give. Maria sobbed louder as the wood creaked.

"MARIA, come out already!" He yelled. It was loud, it was too loud and she heard the wood splintering and she sobbed. Blood dripped down her side, her lower back hurt, and her whole entire body hurt in extension.

"Maria," he sang, causing a especially mournful wail from Maria, "you fucking slut, I'll kill you if you dont stop hiding from me!" It just got louder and louder.

Alexander was on his way and oh god no, no no he couldnt come here with him like this. James didnt like Alexander in the first place, who could tell what could happen-

"Hey you!" She heard his familar voice. Maria didnt know whether to cry of relief or remorse.

"Hamilton!" He growled. "Maria, you called our old bitch to come here to save your sorry ass?" He laughed. "A little girl, Maria, are you kidding me?"

Maria sobbed harder, and the corners of her vision darkened from blood loss and oxygen not quite making its way to her lungs.

"She's so scrawny she barely can fight me off!" He yelled triumphantly, laughing all the while.

She heard loud yelling and scuffling in the hall, and she heard a loud thunk, shaking the wall she was leaning against, and then the noise of a body falling to the floor.

Maria shook, and whispered very softly,

"Alex..?"

The beating against the door continued. She cried more, trying to stay consious. She pulled up her phone. Notifications came from the chat.

.____.

Saturday, 2:48am

heckingturtles: whats going on?

Saturday, 2:53am

heckingturtles: im coming over, laf and herc are up now too, we're on our way.

Elizard: I'm also on my way

.____.

Maria choked. _No no no alex is already hurt and if he hurts anyone else no no n o_

The door splintered more.

.____.

mdygh: im srroy guys im desd hse got us he he goodbye i lvoe you all imsorry

.____.

The door broke down.

.____.

As John walked the first thing he saw was a body slumped at the top of the staircase.

The first thing he heard was a high pitched scream.

"Maria!" Lafayette yelled, running up the stairs, trying his best not to trip over the stairs in the respective darkness. The room was only lit up by a few lamps around the place.

Hercules followed after Laf, and there was a scuffle in the bathroom, followed by a thunk on the floor and a yelling of "Maria, wake up!"

John saw the bloody footsteps running up the stairs and into the bathroom.

John saw his boyfriend crumpled against the wall, a blood puddle underneath him.

He had a knife. James had a fucking knife.

John ran up the stairs and ran into the fray.

.____.

bonbonhaguette: hey, this is Herc

macaronifucker: whats going on?

bonbonhaguette: um well alexander and maria are on their way to the hospital

washingdad: Hercules, what happened.

bonbonhaguette: oh professor Washington um

washingmom: we called the police a few minutes ago. What exactly happened, please tell us.

bonbonhaguette: the problem is is that i dont know what happened i really dont Alex didnt tell us about this he said something about James being a douche bag but i didnt think it was this bad

bonbonhaguette: this is eliza now.

bonbonhaguette: um well basically, Maria had an abusive boyfriend and um, yknow how alex had an affair with her a few years ago? And how we broke up due to it lex didnt want me to tell anyone but James was behind the whole thing and made lex lie lex wasnt really super into her he wouldnt go into it too much but he said he loved her but not like that and something happened and lex finally escaped him when he went to college since james didnt know where he was at and he let it all out and i didnt date him after that and well james dound him and i dont

washingmom: darling breathe

bonbonhaguette: i AM, mrs washington i just

bonbonhaguette: i dont think what i said was clear let me rephrase it

bonbonhaguette: like um lex a few years ago had an affair with them while we were dating in highschool, and he wrote the pamphlet you remember that?

washingmom: yes sweetheart

bonbonhaguette: well lex had been made to write it hell even believe it but like since me and maria became friends she explained what happened and like it was terrible i dont think lex would want me to tell you but it was bad and they ended on bad terms

bonbonhaguette: but he went into college not so near them so he felt safer and i think maria had to stay there

bonbonhaguette: i think he was hurting her and yeah um yeah

washingmom: oh darling..

macaronifucker: christ

washingdad: Which hospital is he in?

bonbonhaguette: um bellvue

bonbonhaguette: the police are taking us in for statements, gtg -Herc

washingmom: stay safe

washingdad: We're heading over to the hospital now.

Saturday, 6:26 am  
"Revv em up"

washingdad: They let us in with him, and Alexander's going to be okay. He got a deep cut on his leg, but it didn't hit his artery, and he got a minor concussion, but he's awake and fine. He tells me to tell you all that.

aaronymous: thats good.

washingdad: They're going to keep him here for Saturday night as well though, but then he'll be discharged. He said people can visit once visiting hours hit.

bonbonhaguette: thats really good we'll come there once everyones done with their statements

bonbonhaguette: its taking forever but it should be over soon

washingdad: You guys should probably sleep first though, it's been a long night. Alex would understand.

bonbonhaguette: there is no time to sleep what r u say i n g

bonbonhaguette: this is eliza. Is maria okay???????¿¿????

washingdad: shes fine

bonbonhaguette: are you sure? She didnt look so fucking good when they carried her out on a gurney.

washingdad: Eliza...

bonbonhaguette: please please just tell me i need to know

washingdad: Well, she's stable. She had substantial blood loss, so she's on an IV right now, and she's asleep. I don't think they're accepting visitors currently.

bonbonhaguette: are you sure?

washingdad: That's all I know, Eliza.

bonbonhaguette: this is Laf again, the only one who had the thought to actually bring a phone

bonbonhaguette: in other news, everyones done with their statements, everythings okay so were on our way

bonbonhaguette: my phone might die while we're on our way so sorry if we go silent

bonbonhaguette: this is laurens IS HE OKAY???

washingdad: Laurens, scroll up.

bonbonhaguette: oh oh okay!! Sorry sorry

bonbonhaguette: im sorry im just worried and ah

washingmom: its alright darling, everythings gonna be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: I write everything on my phone so thats why everything i write is SHIT
> 
> ALSO I DONT LIVE IN NEW YORK I LIVE IN RURAL GEORGIA FORGIVE MY GEOGRAPHICAL ERRORS IF ANY AND IDK IF BELLVUE IS AN ACTUAL HOSPITAL
> 
> ALSO 69 KUDOS ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


	5. In which everythings alright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which all is gonna be okay, and deh is bringin some ppl together, and stitches keep things together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this while i shouldve been studying for my exam tomorrow, and while i shouldve been sleepin
> 
> Oh well
> 
> (Ill fix the format???????? In the morning im really tired or smth)
> 
> In which everything is alright
> 
> Alex: adotfiteme  
> John: heckingturtles  
> Peggy: alcoholism  
> Angelica: unsatisfied  
> Eliza: Elizard  
> Herc: disneyownsme  
> Laf: honhonbagette  
> Tjeff: macaronifucker  
> Mads: praying4death  
> Martha Washington: washingmom  
> George Washington: washingdad  
> Aaron: aaronymous  
> Maria Reynolds: Maria
> 
> Also i listened to DEH if yall cant tell and like. Its pretty good,,,, it hurts me a lil tho some of the songs with previous pains and ye
> 
> Also another reason i didnt post last week is like, ive been really bogged down and ive been stressed and sorta depressed but im pushin thru it 
> 
> Anyway, w no further ado since im exhausted,

 

Wednesday, 4:49pm

adotfiteme: I WANT TO L E A V E

Elizard: LEX YOU CAN BARELY WALK

adotfiteme: I CAN TOO WALK

Elizard: PROVE IT

Elizard: wait no actually dont you might rip the stitches out

heckingturtles: as much as I agree with you bby,,,, i dont think you should be walking yet

adotfiteme: that wasnt even the question :,((((((((((( tho i would enjoy to walk

adotfiteme: ITS TOO CRAMPED IN HER E

aaronymous: aren't you like, not supposed to be on a phone, with a concussion and everything?

heckingturtles: I snuck it in since i cant be with him 24/7, regardless of what I may want according to the nurses : (

adotfiteme: aaron burr, sir! Back from the dead I see ;)

aaronymous: yeah yeah

alcoholism: speaking of walkin when will you be able to walk normally again????? Like w/o stitches and shit

adotfiteme: docs say Imma start rehab like. Tomorrow. Ive been out of bed to test it and like? It feels weird and a lil painful ,, but I can do it

heckingturtles: babe, dont push yourself too hard ahh

alcoholism: get better you heck you cant stay down for long ur the gREAT ALEXANDER HAMILTON

unsatisfied: yo

adotfiteme: waddup

unsatisfied: immense prayer for death

adotfiteme: same, but why???

unsatisfied: ykno like. Midterms are coming up

adotfiteme: FUCJC YOURE RIGHT I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE

heckingturtles: what have you DONE, angie

adotfiteme: john,,,, can you please,,,,,, try to get my work

aaronymous: 1) John barely shares any classes with you, 2) youre like. 5 months ahead 3) the teachersll understand

adotfiteme: BURR YOU GET MY STUFF

aaronymous: ,,,

adotfiteme: please

aaronymous: fine

adotfiteme: <3333 owe you one

macaronifucker: aaron burr on? And alex asking nicely for stuff? Am I high?

adotfiteme: im actually gonna fight you

macaronifucker: @ me

adotfiteme: I WILL @ U WITH A 50 PAGE ESSAY ON WHY YOURE DUMB

washingmom: alexander? Darling, why are you on?

adotfiteme: GOTTA BLAST

.____.

_Elizard >>> adotfiteme_

Elizard: r u still here???

adotfiteme: yea just making sure madre doesnt catch me

adotfiteme: whats up?

Elizard: i um. Wanted to ask if you knew anything about Maria's condition,,, cause no one knows,,,, and im worried

adotfiteme: shes only letting a few visitors in right now

Elizard: oh

adotfiteme: lucky you one of those is me >:DDD

Elizard: oh!

adotfiteme: i havent gone much because. Im not capable rn ykno

adotfiteme: but shes awake now! And physically okay, ish. She has a bunch of bruises and bunch of stitches in her side and shoulder,,, but um yea!!

adotfiteme: i can ask her to let you visit???

Elizard: um if you could I'd really appreciate it,,,,

adotfiteme: k! Ill see what I can do ;)

Elizard: youre a lifesaver, lex

adotfiteme: 'sno problem ^^

.____.

Thursday, 6:35pm

  
adotfiteme: im literally dyi n. G guys

bonbonhaguette: its your fault for wanting to start the therapy so early, mon ami

adotfiteme: I DIDNT THINK IT WOULD HURT THIS MUCH

disneyownsme: r es. T

adotfiteme: maybe I WILL : (((

._____.

Friday, 7:56pm

adotfiteme added #uwillbfound to this group

adotfiteme: hey guys!!!!!! So like marias phone got broken™ so i guess we (being me liz and john) bought her a new one

#uwillbfound: hey

bonbonhaguette: bonjour, miss maria

praying4death: not to b rude or anything but wots up w the name?

#uwillbfound changed their name to Maria.

Maria: oh its nothing its just a um musical i really like!!! Well from one i like

alcoholism: oh, Dear Evan Hansen?

Maria: mhm!!!

alcoholism: nice

adotfiteme: Maria, pro at making usernames since 2017

Maria: shut up alex

Elizard: need we remind you of your first name????

adotfiteme: clever in the time, edgy looking back

Elizard: yes because "hurricaneman" is clever

adotfiteme: FI G H T me

adotfiteme: ALSO UN RELATED BUT

adotfiteme: GUESS WHO GETS OUT MONDAY :DDDDDD

Maria: ill be getting out next friday, doctors say, if nothing goes wrong

heckingturtles: FANTASTIC THEN WE CAN CODDLE YOU AT H O M E

adotfiteme: >:)))))

.____.

  
Saturday, 4:34pm  
alcoholism >>> unsatisfied

alcoholism: completely and totally random, but eliza totally has a crush on Maria doesnt she

unsatisfied: i was starting to think i was the only one to realize.

alcoholism: what do we do???

unsatisfied: unno, maria might take a while before wanting to get into a relationship again. I guess let it play out???

alcoholism: yea maybe--- or we push them to date

unsatisfied: peggy no

.____.

Monday, 5:55pm

adotfiteme: FINALLY

adotfiteme: FREE FROM THE SHACKLES OF H E L L

heckingturtles: it wasnt th a t bad

heckingturtles: heck lex sit down

adotfiteme: YOU CANNOT TAME ME CANNOT FORCE ME TO SIT IN THIS ROLLING C HA. I R

macaronifucker: hamiltons in a wheelchair?

heckingturtles: yeah, until he gets his stitches out, like a few weeks from now. Hes still gotta go in for pt like, twice a week, but they decided it was more beneficial if he healed at home i guess. Abt the stitches thing, if hes careful and has someone there he can walk in the house smth like that

macaronifucker: not like it changes his height any

adotfiteme: >>:((((((((((

  
adotfiteme added alcoholism, disneyownsme, Elizard, heckingturtles, honhonbaguette & unsatisfied to this group

adotfiteme has left this group untitled.

  
adotfiteme: listen ik we're all just poor college students (or highschool student, in pegs case) but u know how dear evan hansen is on broadway

adotfiteme: and how maria likes it

Elizard: mhm???

adotfiteme: i feel like we should all try to get at least one or two tickets to see it i have some money saved i think

heckingturtles: how??

adotfiteme: the pros of not eating, sleeping, or anything

adotfiteme: but seriously- despite my protesting- the washingtons still are paying for my hospital bills the kind souls

adotfiteme: theyre up to two hundred dollars ish a piece from what I know

disneyownsme: im down

bonbonhaguette: how do you say, ditto

unsatisfied: the great alexander, being forced to not pay hospital bills? Atrocious.

unsatisfied: but im chill with that. Poor girls had an awful past few weeks, needs smth i suppose !!

heckingturtles: u kno my answer <3333

adotfiteme: rev crew + angelica are down how abt the rest of the schuylers?

disneyownsme: the rev crew?

adotfiteme: the original members of the "revv em up" chat, obv

disneyownsme: ,,k

alcoholism: yeet

adotfiteme: Eliza?

Elizard: oh um yeah ofc!!!

Elizard: when???

adotfiteme: when we can get decent seats- whos gonna go????

disneyownsme: i feel like i wouldnt be able to appreciate it well enough idk

bonbonhaguette: idk, same reason as herc and- im not much of a musical nerd- nothing wrong with musicals tho

adotfiteme: I understand- and oh my, did lafayette just speak a coherent sentence without adding a 'how you say'?

bonbonhaguette: write, and how you say >:(((((((

heckingturtles: idk if I wanna go. I heard its really heart wrenching, and i dont wanna b hurt

adotfiteme: im prolly not gonna go bc ive listened to a bit of it????? And i cried and i dont wanna cry again so yo

alcoholism: me and ang cant go, for many reasons ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

adotfiteme: thats incest

alcoholism: WAIT NO THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT

adotfiteme: sure ;)

adotfiteme: so eliza???

Elizard: ill go

Elizard: i mean! I dont want her to be alone, and like yeah um yeah! It looks interesting yeah. Ill be sure to have that day good and off

adotfiteme: ok liz ^^

._____.

adotfiteme added alcoholism, disneyownsme, heckingturtles, honhonbaguette & unsatisfied to this group

adotfiteme named this group "elizas fuckin gay rt if you agree"

alcoholism: RT

unsatisfied: RT

disneyownsme: rt

honhonbaguette: rt

heckingturtles: r t

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case yall wanted it: my tumblr is 'somethingintheend' idk felt like it was worth mentioning ieven tho its just me reblogging stuff bc im trash
> 
> And also,,,,,,,,,,, shit i forgot wait
> 
> WAIT I REMEMBERED:;;; if yall dont like the eliza and maria stuff inform me;;; this stories goin on a train wreck
> 
> ALSO ONE MORE THING;;; give me ideas i am Running Out
> 
> thanks for nearly 100 kudos yall!!!!!!!!!!! Aaaa and for like, nearly 900 hits aaaaaaAAAA bye see yall next time--- hopefully next week !!


	6. In Which John is Sick, and Alex Doesn't Enjoy That

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the authors sick so they decide to make one of the characters suffer too, and the author doesnt know how to write Hercules Mulligan or Thomas Jefferson or any characters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex: adotfiteme  
> John: heckingturtles  
> Peggy: alcoholism  
> Angelica: unsatisfied  
> Eliza: Elizard  
> Herc: disneyownsme  
> Laf: honhonbagette  
> Tjeff: macaronifucker  
> Mads: praying4death  
> Martha Washington: washingmom  
> George Washington: washingdad  
> Aaron: aaronymous  
> Maria Reynolds: Maria

Wednesday, 11:45am  
"revv em up"

heckingturtles: im sick

heckingturtles: and im lonely ;;;;;

disneyownsme: why tho

heckingturtles: lex locked me out of the bedroom and said im not allowed in til im better

unsatisfied: hes an amazing boyf riend isnt he

heckingturtles: on the other hand do yall have medication like soMETHING TO END MY SUFFERING

disneyownsme: i have some morphine

heckingturtles: I meant like something to decongest me

heckingturtles: why do you have morphine

disneyownsme: um.

bonbonhaguette: i can go out and get some like, idk cold meds

heckingturtles: my saviour

heckingturtles: @adotfiteme a better boyfriend than youll ever b : (((((

disneyownsme: hey thats not your boyfriend

heckingturtles: and its urs

disneyownsme: yeah

disneyownsme: no i mean

heckingturtles: wh

adotfiteme: I AM NOT GETTING NEAR THOSE INVISIBLE LITTLE THINGS

heckingturtles: could you possibly be more c h i l l

macaronifucker: why are you like this

adotfiteme: fight m e

adotfiteme: fuck i gotta piss

heckingturtles: LEX ARE YOU OKAY I HEARD A THUNK

adotfiteme: iM FINE

heckingturtles: alexander,,,,,,,

adotfiteme: Im fine babe i swear i just dropped something

heckingturtles: i miss you

adotfiteme: i miss you too

macaronifucker: gAYYYYY

adotfiteme: yes we are,,, got a problem

macaronifucker: me and my boyfriend are gayer than youll ever be

adotfiteme: OH YEAH?????

  
heckingturtles: Alex just stumbled to me with a sock tied around his mouth and nose and quickly hugged me and then fell to the couch moaning in pain

Maria: he didnt tear the stitches out right?

  
heckingturtles: yea he didnt, i checked as i carried him back upstairs despite his protests

heckingturtles: i just got kicked out of my own room ; (((((

adotfiteme: get that fever down and then u can come back in

adotfiteme: i am going to wash my s e l f

aaronymous: who knew hamilton was such a germophobe

macaronifucker: rt

heckingturtles: me

bonbonhaguette: me

unsatisfied: me

Elizard: me

alcoholism: me

Maria: me

disneyownsme: me

heckingturtles: look whos back ;))))

disneyownsme: i am being ATTACKED yall

macaronifucker: why dont I know why hamilton is so wary of germs wtf im the only one that doesnt know

aaronymous: jefferson i asked first

Elizard: you guys havent gotten achievement unlocked: backstory so back off

Praying4death: i see

heckingturtles: TAG YOURSELF IM THE FACT MADISON JUST JUMPS INTO THE CONVO

disneyownsme: r t

praying4death: well s orry : ////

bonbonhaguette: open your fuckin door john, im here

heckingturtles: ILL BE RIGHT THERE

disneyownsme: yall

unsatisfied: 'yall'

macaronifucker: yall is my thing yall >:(

disneyownsme: im from t h e. S o u t h t o o

disneyownsme: well not true i was born in ireland but i moved like down to like the southeastern US for like,, idk how many years i moved out wait

macaronifucker: i have another southern friend wow

praying4death: what am i, chopped liver

macaronifucker: yeah but i love chopped liver <333

disneyownsme: youre gross Jefferson

bonbonhaguette: john i s c ry i n g

disneyownsme: WOAH WHAT HAPPENED

bonbonhaguette: i BROUGHT SOUP AND STUFF AND HES JUST

heckingturtles: mlex im braeKING UO W U ABD GIING OYT WITH THIS BEUATIFUL BEIGN

adotfiteme: hurtful

macaronifucker: relationship problems i see ;)

bonbonhaguette: JOHNS CRYING HARDER NOW OH NO

bonbonhaguette: LEX OPENED THE DOOR TO THE BEDROOM

bonbonhaguette: I should prolly let them ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

.____.

_adotfiteme >>> heckingturtles_

adotfiteme: john im sorry im being such a prick

adotfiteme: i just

heckingturtles: no lex its okay i understand

adotfiteme: im just really scared because mom got sick before me and what if i got sick thne i in turn got you sicker and and then you die i dont wanna lose you John i love yuo so ncuh

heckingturtles: alex calm down its okay, I wont die, its just a cold i wont die

adotfiteme: youre the fucking sick one why am i fucking complaining

heckingturtles: lex....

adotfiteme: and I know that but john im still so scared,,,

heckingturtles: i dunno if itll help but ill get a medical mask that laf brougt over? And ill make like um iunno and we can watch shitty movies in your room while we snuggle

adotfiteme: you shouldnt have to do make all that stuff youre sick

heckingturtles: lex you cant walk

adotfiteme: just come in here ill turn on the tv

heckingturtles: im still grabbing a mask

adotfiteme: ...thanks

heckingturtles: no problem babe.

.____.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My extreme lack of self-confidence and the fact that i wrote this while i was probably half delirious makes me not very proud of this chapter so sorry if its bad !!!! And its short im sorry guys aahhh
> 
> THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR OVER 100 KUDOS TOO?????? im crying AAA
> 
> MORE CRYING BDCAUSE WE HIT OVER 1000 HITS THANK YOU GUYS  
> (If you notice like 2 references ill give you a cookie because yes this is me, the author who cant stay in one fandom for one week)


	7. In which Midterms are finally Over and Everyone is Dead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alexander's work ethic returns, Aaron is a fucking furry, and Eliza's more gay than we thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MRNANHDNRNE schools over after monday god bless!!!!
> 
> Um also like!!! This is like. Time skip 2 weeks in advance because idk
> 
> Also most of the spelling errors in this chapter a r e intentional if u need to know

 

Thursday, 4:37pm  
"[untitled]"

Elizard: okay guys its been like two weeks since Maria got out are we going to go soon or i

disneyownsme: dude its literally in the middle of exams

Elizard: but that means the semesters almost over and then that means its almost christmas and we'll never get tickets then???

bonbonhaguette: I would love to get on with the plan, none of us except john has seen Alexander. Its quite a- how do you say- predicament.

Elizard: then you should get him out of there????????

heckingturtles: i havent seen him any except when i run by like three times a day to drop off some food by the library

Elizard: j o h n

heckingturtles: i cant just drag him back here he'd be really upset but he's eating the stuff im bringing Eliza

Elizard: ...finals are almost over right?

heckingturtles: yea, his last final is tomorrow. I dont think any of the rest of us have another.

Elizard: mmmm augh

unsatisfied: liza?

Elizard: what is it

unsatified: whats wrong?

Elizard: its nothing mmrnwjsn

unsatisfied: you can always message me

alcoholism: same

Elizard: mhm

.____.

Friday, 7:09pm  
"Revv em up"

heckingturtles: h e l p

praying4death: ?????????

heckingturtles: so the Boys™ are coming over in like 20 minutes for post-finals movie night and so Lex passed out as soon as he came back from the exam and now hes up and all thats playing

heckingturtles: IS A BRINGG ME TO LIFE PIANO COVER

Maria: wake me up (wake me up inside)

heckingturtles: pl EASE

aaronymous: yiff me up (yiff me up inside)

alcoholism: I SAW YIFF AND IM HERE ANd KINKSHAMING YALL SINNERS

alcoholism: A A R O N

alcoholism: is a FUCKIN F U R R Y

aaronymous: i am being attacked

heckingturtles sent a video: sendhelp.mov

heckingturtles: LEX BABE I LOVE YOU BUT YOU GOTTA STOP

aaronymous: Hamilton call out post: he hasnt even changed out of his clothes since finals

adotfiteme: SHYR TEH HEKL YUOT FSCE

macaronifucker: was that even english

adotfiteme: shit up jerkershit i hsvent tuped fro a fww weeks

heckingturtles: update: the music is still playing

adotfiteme: wHT MUST YOI EXPOSE ME S O

praying4death: shit up jerkershit is what im gonna say to thomas when im mad at him from now on

macaronifucker: >:((((((

unsatisfied: the chat is a l i v e again

disneyownsme: midterms are over and we are all dead

bonbonhaguette: by the way, we are here

disneyownsme: oh my god I can hear the music from out here why havent yall had a noise complaint

heckingturtles: BRB GETTING THE DOOR

adotfiteme: im dying from literslly erythjng save mt achign so u l

heckingturtles: BYE GUYS WE'll BE OFF FOR THE NIGHT IM CONFISCATING ALL PHONES

Elizard: well then

alcoholism: SHIT IM LATE TO THE PARTY

alcoholism: petition to crash The Boys ™ party

macaronifucker: i dont even know where he lives so nah

praying4death: same

aaronymous: s ame

Elizard: i cant leave where im @ sadly

macaronifucker: YKNOW WHAT JAMIE CMERE TO MY HOUSE WE'lL HAVE OUR OW N PARTY

aaronymous: can I join

aaronymous: i mean like not like. If its annoying ill just

macaronifucker: cmon burr

aaronymous: kk

alcoholism: well im going to alexs

unsatisfied: peggy you cant drive

alcoholism: not l e g a l l y ; )

unsatisfied: UGH FINE ILL JOIN YOU I CANT HAVE MY BABY SISTER GETTING A CRIMINAL RECORD

alcoholism: Y E E T

Maria: I couldnt make it either

Elizard: same t h o

Maria: so um hey

Elizard: hey

.____.

Saturday, 7:04am  
"[untitled]"

adotfiteme: i am back and awake and not dead

adotfiteme: in relation to the money we should have enough??? If it is that we've compiled like idk two hundred plis

Elizard: I got it covered

adotfiteme: Liz are you sure??? Bc i got some spare money and stuff

Elizard: i mean unless you want extra money for food or some shit

adotfiteme: liza i feel bad im givin you some money

Elizard: k,,,, but i already got two tickets

adotfiteme: W H A T???????

Elizard: its like. The tickets are set for february first. I talked to Maria about it and shes really excited???

adotfiteme: thats great omf!!!! Im sorry thst you kno the past few weeks

Elizard: i know you get like that but just take care of yourself??? I worry about you

adotfiteme: yea i know

Elizard: so im figuring youre gonna like have a christmas get together

adotfiteme: yea all the cool kids are gonna be there

Elizard: ik you dont like them but maybe you should add jefferson mads and burr??? They seem left out

adotfiteme: emnanehenam eliza,,,

Elizard: i know but

adotfiteme: maybe ill think about it

Elizsrd: k thx

.____.

Saturday, 7:07am

"revv em up"

adotfiteme: Y O

macaronifucker: WHY ARE YOU UP

adotfiteme: WHY ARE /YOU/ UP?????

macaronifucker: i wake up around this time???? Wtf get out

adotfiteme: i n e v e r s l e e p

macaronifucker: i can tell

adotfiteme: Mmebabdne EXCUSE ME

adotfiteme: I TAKE IT UPON MYSELF TO STAB MYSELF WITH 5 CAFFIENE PATCHES A DAY AND TWO COFFEE CUPS ARE D R U N K E EVRY DAY

Elizard: woa lex be careful

adotfiteme: memehshanan im just like um word fuck

adotfiteme: overexaggerating thats the word

bonbonhaguette: alex is a liar

Elizard: A L E X

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also yes lex is still incapable of standing for a long time, strong boy gets his stitches out soon tho!!


	8. In Which Alex Gets His Stitches and We Prepare for a Christmas Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Lex gets more sentimental than normal, and Burr, Jeffs, and Mads talk more than usual. And Peggy isnt happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have an offical chapter counter now;;;;;; im crying yall 
> 
> Anyway sorry if stuff is sparse I have a two week camp coming up really soon so that time I will be Unable to Update and ill probably be in a creative depression for a while after bc its ART camp but Ill try to get!!! Things out 
> 
> Also: Lowkey hatred on Konosuba in this chapter ;;;; in case you guys care
> 
> I think you guys have the list memorized by now???? Idk ill leave it in the end notes

Monday, 2:04pm  
"Revv em up"

heckingturtles: IM TAKING ALEX TO THE DOCTOR ;0009

Maria: oh no

aaronymous: what did he do this time?

adotfiteme: WHAT DO YOU MEAN "WHAT DID HE DO THIS TIME"

adotfiteme: yall are too mean, for this cinnamon roll who has done nothing wrong in life

macaronifucker: yeah right

adotfiteme: Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑)

macaronifucker: what kind of emoji is that

adotfiteme: the BEST kind

adotfiteme: ANYWAY IM GETTING MY STITCHES OUT AND IM G L A D

heckingturtles: and since like alex didnt wanna go alone im here

adotfiteme: (๑>◡<๑)

praying4death: pardon me but what is up with the japanese emojis

heckingturtles: hes going through a phase

adotfiteme: it is NOT a phase

adotfiteme: ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=┌(;￣◇￣)┘

aaronymous: what the fuck

heckingturtles: we're @ the doctors office see yall later

praying4death: Do you know why I hate UNDERTALE? Because it's the best game ever made. The graphics look like they were drawn by a four year old with the talents of Pablo Picasso in his prime. Which is what I would've said if I liked the graphics. Which I do. Not. Narratively, this game is a paragon of interactive storytelling. Every choice you make weighs on your conscious because the connections you make with the characters feel organic. And that's why I'm giving this game a five out of five... billion. It fucking sucks.

aaronymous: the longest thing Mads has sent in this chat

praying4death: I DDINT SEND THAT THOMAS DID

macaronifucker: >:((( did not you fucking liar

alcoholism: what the fuck is that

praying4death: its khonjin house??????????? Whats wrong wth you how do you not know it

praying4death: wait

alcoholism: I

macaronifucker: James comes out as a weeaboo

praying4death: ????????? I am not

macaronifucker: sure bud ;))))

praying4death: rude

alcoholism: in all reality a good anime is like. Konosuba

praying4death: hhhhhhhhhhh

alcoholism: you have a problem Jamie ;)

praying4death: dont call me that ever again please thanks

alcoholism: TJeffs calls you that all the time tho >:(((

praying4death: youre not thomas

alcoholism: fuck youre right

Monday, 4:47pm  
"Revv em up"

adotfiteme: hey sir can like um you and mrs martha like leave the chat,, i have to talk to them abt smth

washingdad: yeah thats alright

washingmom: k darling,,,,,, just remember you can tell us anything

adotfiteme: i know i know

_washingmom left the chat_

washingdad: love you

adotfiteme: thanks dad

_washingdad left the chat_

adotfiteme: wait fuck

macaronifucker: THAT was wild im telling literally everyone i know

adotfiteme: if you dare youre uninvited from every party i ever have and I will literally kill you

alcoholism: that was the most affectionate ive seen alex to them

adotfiteme: E N D this teasing

adotfiteme: anyway,,,, all of you here (except peggy) are invited to my christmas party this friday

alcoholism: WHY NOT ME

adotfiteme: there is to be alcohol there,,,, thats illegal

alcoholism: YOURE NOT EVEN OF THE LEGAL DRINKING AGE UM

adotfiteme: I WILL BE IN LIKE 20 DAYS SHHHHHHH

aaronymous: all of us?

adotfiteme: yes all of you everyone in this chat

macaronifucker: wow so kind ;00000

adotfiteme: shut up

adotfiteme: does everyone know where mine and johns dorm is

macaronifucker: nope

adotfiteme: hitch a ride then, fuckers

praying4death: why on campus

adotfiteme: I dont want the washingtons to see me blackout drunk obv

alcoholism: this is margarita "peggy" schuyler abuse i cant believe this

Elizard: Ill be there

Maria: also I

unsatisfied: yep ill be there

aaronymous: I should be able to, ill check again and like get back to you

bonbonhaguette: I'll bring the booze mon ami ;))))

disneyownsme: HELL YEA ILL BE THERE

adotfiteme: HELL YEA EVERYONES C O M I N

alcoholism: not me though >:(((((((

adotfiteme: next time you can come

alcoholism: you SWEAR to me?

adotfiteme: um yea sure

alcoholism: y e s

heckingturtles: lex the next party is the new years party.

adotfiteme: fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment or smth bc I'm dying and needing some support
> 
> Alex: adotfiteme  
> John: heckingturtles  
> Peggy: alcoholism  
> Angelica: unsatisfied  
> Eliza: Elizard  
> Herc: disneyownsme  
> Laf: bonbonhagette  
> Tjeff: macaronifucker  
> Mads: praying4death  
> Martha Washington: washingmom  
> George Washington: washingdad  
> Aaron: aaronymous  
> Maria Reynolds: Maria


	9. In Which CHRISTMAS IN JUNE? ITS MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which everyone switches their names to fit the holiday cheer, and the gang cries over frosty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me? A nonreligious person? Writing a christmas chapter? In June? Its more likely than you think.
> 
> This prolly sucks ASS since i wrote it in a day trying to get it out 
> 
> Read at the end bc I have some things I need to say and I feel like you guys wanna reAD THE CHAPTER FIRST
> 
> anyway, warning for hinted sex and christmas, i guess

 

"Revv em Up"  
Thursday, 11:59PM

adotfiteme: ITS ALMOST TOME

Friday, 12:00AM

adotfiteme: MERRY CRISMTNE

adotfiteme changed their name to adotCHRISTMAS

adotCHRISTMAS: ITS CHRISTMAS S S S

heckingturtles: alex darling go to sleep its midnight

adotCHRISTMAS: NOT BEFORE YOU BECOME F E S T I V E

heckingturtles: alex youre not even religious

adotCHRISTMAS: I am, occassionally

adotCHRISTMAS: JOHN, D E A R ES T

heckingturtles changed their to heckingchristmas

heckingchristmas: babe come to bed

adotCHRISTMAS: but everyone must be FESTIVE

heckingchristmas: ;(

adotCHRISTMAS: fine ill come to bed, BUT EVERYYONE BETTER BE FESTIVE BEFORE THE PARTY TONIGHT

heckingchristmas: alexander, dearest

adotCHRISTMAS: okay,,,,,,,,,

heckingchristmas: alex, i dont mean coming upstairs and laying down and working on something

adotCHRISTMAS: john well u didnt specify

heckcingchristmas: why are we texting instead of talking for one

adotCHRISTMAS: I dont feel like speaking, saving my voice for 2 N I. T E

heckingturtles- can we please just sleep so we both have energy for tomorrow

adotCHRISTMAS: im not t i r e d

heckingturtles: ;)))))

adotCHRISTMAS: o >>>;00000 bye yOU ALL

.____.

Friday, 10:47AM  
"Revv em up"

macaronifucker has changed their name to festivefucker

festivefucker: its christmas eve and im p r e p a r ed

adotCHRISTMAS: for once I agree with jeffershit

aaronymous: actually, hamilton, you guys are a lot alike

adotCHRISTMAS: dont lie

alcoholism: YOOOO

adotCHRISTMAS: oh no

alcoholism changed their name to FELIZNAVIDAD

FELIZNAVIDAD: I WANNA WISH UOU A M E R RRY CHRISTMAS

adotCHRISTMAS: more like feliz naviDEAD

FELIZNAVIDAD: thats the best christmas song and you know it

adotCHRISTMAS: naw man

FELIZNAVIDAD: >>>>::((((((((( let me have this since YOU WONT LET ME TO THE PARTY

adotCHRISTMAS: FIGHT ME

adotCHRISTMAS: WHERE IS ALL YoU ALLS C HR I S T MA S SP I R I T

adotCHRISTMAS: btw whos bringing the booze

disneyownsme: I am

adotCHRISTMAS: LIT

disneyownsme changed their name to christmasownsme

praying4death changed their name to praying4santa

praying4santa: just so you know, Thomas did that not me!!!

christmasownsme: sure bud

adotCHRISTMAS: IM SO READY FOR TONITE!!!!! :DDDD

adotCHRISTMAS: John wants me to help with the food so bye

bonbonhaguette: 'help' with the 'food'

adotCHRISTMAS: ;;;))))))))

aaronymous: Hamilton, I must say, that I do not want to know about your sexual escapades with Laurens.

adotCHRISTMAS: ;))))))))))

heckingchristmas: alex!

adotCHRISTMAS: ok!!!

._____.

Friday, 10:02 PM

unsatisfied added Elizard and FELIZNAVIDAD to a chat

unsatisfied named this chat "the schuyler peggys"

unsatisfied: I have been named to be the Responsible One so here I Am

FELIZNAVIDAD: wow and not Eliza?????????

unsatisfied: thanks peggy :///

FELIZNAVIDAD: sorry ;;;; love you sis

unsatisfied: love you too pegs

unsatisfied: status update: eliza has had 2 shots of whiskey and I am livid

FELIZNAVIDAD: ????????

unsatisfied: idk eliza hardly drinks

unsatisfied: its only an hour in and theyre playing twister drunk. What is this

FELIZNAVIDAD: WHO IS

unsatisfied: well its one of the BIG BOARDS or whatever so Lex, Liz, John, and Maria

FELIZNAVIDAD: so the gays

unsatisfied: yep

unsatisfied: and they all fall down

FELIZNAVIDAD: who won?

unsatisfied: dk theyre just all laughing on the floor

unsatisfied: were all now playing Never Have I Ever

FELIZNAVIDAD: IM S A D I WANNA PLAY

unsatisfied: ....

unsatisfied: and Alex and John are out

FELIZNAVIDAD: g o o d

unsatisfied: we're now all watching the frosty movie and this is Pretty Good

FELIZNAVIDAD: i want to c o m e

unsatisfied: i have to watch these babies and half of them are nursing a beer while sobbing over a fictional snowman

FELIZNAVIDAD: i hate you.

unsatisfied: lies

_[249 hidden messages]_

"the schuyler peggys"  
Saturday, 2:02AM

FELIZNAVIDAD: mmfmdffffffffff im leaving you guys are all doing fun stuff and im a l o ne on christmas d a y e. V e

FELIZNAVIDAD: i didnt mean it seriously

FELIZNAVIDAD: Angelica?

.____.

"Revv Em Up"  
Saturday, 9:46AM

christmasownsme: oh no

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So like. The thing I mentioned last update?? The thing that I have to be gone for two weeks? Yeah thats this time. Though, if I plan things out right, I should be able to squeeze out a chapter saturday or sunday, but I make no promises because i might be ~tired~ and stuff but!!! Just wanted to warn you guys. Thanks for reading and Leave Me a Comment because I Am Fueled On Comments


	10. in which the crew has a hangover, and the author doesnt know how to end a chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> where everyone handles a hangover, new years happens, and alex gets ready for A BIRTH DA Y

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "ill try to update as soon as i can after the camp" //a month later// fuck I better write
> 
> sorry guys!!! I have some explanations in the end notes, so if you want them, there.
> 
> I also wrote this Extra Long (ish) so you guys would know How sorry I Am
> 
> this MAY be the last fluffy chapter for a while sorry guys mmmf
> 
> warnings: implied sexual content, underage drinking!!
> 
> Alex: adotCHRISTMAS  
> John: heckingchristmas  
> Peggy: FELIZNAVIDAD  
> Angelica: unfestive  
> Eliza: Elizard  
> Herc: christmasownsme  
> Laf: bonbonhagette  
> Tjeff: festivefucker  
> Mads: praying4santa  
> Aaron: aaronymous  
> Maria Reynolds: Maria (asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw)
> 
> note: angelica had changed her name between the hidden messages i realized i could do this holy fuck

Saturday, 9:47am  
"Revv em up"

adotCHRISTMAS: f u c k

FELIZNAVIDAD: Whats going on

FELIZNAVIDAD: oh wait up a min

unfestive: theyre all hungover and Eliza's puking in the bathroom

FELIZNAVIDAD: hah, SUCKERS

bonbonhaguette: s t o p y e l l i n g

FELIZNAVIDAD: im not even there tf you talking abt

festivefucker: Hamilton if you dont stop screaming i will personally rip out your tongue and watch you try to make noise as you choke on your blood

FELIZNAVIDAD: holy fuck

praying4santa: um thomas please calm down

heckingCHRISTMAS: honestly for once i agree (though to a way lesser degree,) pls stop screaming Alex

unfestive: and now John is kissing Alexander to shut him up. wild

Maria: im d y i n g wheres the advil or whatever the heck medicine it is

Elizard: here I'll show you

FELIZNAVIDAD: ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)

unfestive: peggy no

FELIZNAVIDAD: : (

unfestive: honestly everyone in the house is silent but we're still all talking over text its weird

aaronymous: It's because all of us are hungover.

unfestive: I know that aaron

adotCHRISTMAS: can you guys wait to do this again about a week from now

unfestive: oh god

aaronymous: hell no

adotCHRISTMAS: >: ((((((((

heckingchristmas: hon we'll have 3 parties in two weeks i hate to break it to you but I think it would just be? better to just chill on new years??

FELIZNAVIDAD: fuck no

adotCHRISTMAS: fine whatever >; (

FELIZNAVIDAD: >>>: ( alex youve betrayed me

heckingchristmas: we can do something special, just me and you on new years?

unfestive: gross

FELIZNAVIDAD: ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)

praying4santa: yeah I dont think me and thomas wouldve been able to make it to new years because like

festivefucker: dont tell them and give them blackmail stuff

FELIZNAVIDAD: ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)

aaronymous: is that all u ever say peggy

FELIZNAVIDAD: ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)

aaronymous: ( ͡o ͜ʖ ͡o)

FELIZNAVIDAD: doNT MOCK ME >>>:::((((((((((((((

aaronymous: honestly fight me im tired

festivefucker: oohhh some TENSION

adotCHRISTMAS: getting my popcorn

adotCHRISTMAS: wait fuck you tjeffs dont copy my style

festivefucker: no its MY style u shit

adotCHRISTMAS: LETS GO

bonbonhaguette: W I L D

.____.

Sunday, 5:47pm

_christmasownsme changed their name to disneyownsme_

disneyownsme: christmas doesnt own me anymore >>>: (

FELIZNAVIDAD: : (((

_FELIZNAVIDAD changed their name to alcoholism_

_praying4santa changed their name to praying4death_

_Maria changed their name to asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw_

adotCHRISTMAS: Maria wtf

Elizard: that almost has the same number of syllables as "it's a cold and its a broken hallelujah"

unfestive changed their name to unsatisfied

unsatisfied: Maria why

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: I saw a meme

alcoholism: JOIN MEME

aaronymous: join us

_heckingchristmas changed their name to heckingturtles_

adotCHRISTMAS: im ALONE now >>>: (

festivefucker: ummm no youre not

adotCHRISTMAS: no fuck u

festivefucker: bite me hamilton

adotCHRISTMAS: i bet I know who does bite you

festivefucker: f i g h t

adotCHRISTMAS: right outside okay lets g o

heckingturtles: ...neither one moves

praying4death: wild

alcoholism: character development at its finest

adotCHRISTMAS: fuk u

_adotCHRISTMAS changed their name to adotfiteme_

festivefucker: i am the victor of festive cheer

adotfiteme: fuk u

festivefucker: when and where

adotfiteme: you wish

festivefucker: youre the one who said it

_festivefucker changed their name to macaronifucker_

macaronifucker: :^)

.____.

Friday, 6:47pm

adotfiteme: H A P P Y N E W Y E A R

unsatisfied: its not next year for another 5 hours

adotfiteme: i dont care its new years EVE

.___.

Friday, 11:30pm

adotfiteme: THIRTY MINUTES!!!!

alcoholism: DUDE MARIA CAME OVER AND THEYRE ALL WASTED IM ALONE AND SOBER

alcoholism: well mostly

adotfiteme: how much have you had 2 drink peggy im calling the cops

alcoholism: im the resident Check For Dad assistant so only like half a cup of Eliza's beer ™

alcoholism: Elizas fuckin GONE theyre like playing beer pong??? its fuckin wild

 

adotfiteme: ONE MINUTE GUYS HOLY FUCK THE BALL UJFMENbenenm

macaronifucker: why are you like this ham mfg

macaronifucker: some people are in the next year already time is relative

adotfiteme: f i g h t me tjeffs

heckingturtles: LEX LOOK AT THE TV

alcoholism: YELLING

disneyownsme: y a l l holy fuck

Saturday, 12:00am

  
_bonbonhaguette sent a picture to "Revv em up"_

bonbonhaguette: happy new year!!

alcoholism: HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

disneyownsme: happy new deer

macaronifucker: man i cant believe i havent talked to any of you since last year

heckingturtles: happy new year!

adotfiteme: H A P P Y J E W Y E A R

adotfiteme: WAIT FUCK

adotfiteme: NES*

adotfiteme: N E W*

disneyownsme: iM WEEPING

alcoholism: happy jew year, year of the jews

heckingturtles: mfmtnejsbndnem

adotfiteme: i hate all of you

alcoholism: iM YELLING ELIZA AND MARIA ARE MAKING OUT

macaronifucker: yall shut up im busy

adotfiteme: ;)

heckingturtles: lex we're busy too

adotfiteme: oh YEAH RIGHT BYE GUYS

bonbonhaguette: we're gone too b y e

alcoholism: and yet again, no one else is here

aaronymous: im here

alcoholism: not you

.____.

Saturday, 8:47am  
"Revv em up"

adotfiteme: i didnt notice THE LAST YEAR JOKES

adotfiteme: i mean

adotfiteme: man i cant believe i havent seen any of you since last year, wild

heckingturtles: lex i love you but shut up

adotfiteme: man i haven't kissed you since last year

heckingturtles: alex we

heckingturtles: nevermind

adotfiteme: you love me <3

heckingturtles: :/

adotfiteme: want me to make food ? or smth

heckingturtles: babe you literally suck ass at cooking

adotfiteme: ill call for some food

heckingturtles: ,,, ok

adotfiteme: <3

unsatisfied: what is this gross domestic shit in my feed, unliked, unfollowed, blocked

alcoholism: youre just grumpy cause youre hungover

unsatisfied: i hate you

alcoholism: <3333

.____.

Saturday, 9:01am

  
_Elizard >>> asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw_

Elizard: are we gonna

Elizard: um

Elizard: talk about last night

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: not yet im sorry

Elizard: its good !

.____.

"Revv em up"  
Saturday, 9:47am

adotfiteme: chinese food has never tasted so good

heckingturtles: rt

macaronifucker: rt

bonbonhaguette: game of thrones has never been so good

  
bonbonhaguette: rlly nothing

disneyownsme: rt

bonbonhaguette: thanks

.____.

Monday, 2:49am

adotfiteme: As a note: you all are

adotfiteme: coming to mine and John's dorm on my birthday right?

adotfiteme: Shit didn't notice it was this late I better sleep before John drags my ass, good night.

.____.

_heckingturtles >>> adotfiteme_

heckingturtles: I was already awake alex, I couldn't sleep, are you alright?

adotfiteme: It's late and my brain won't shut up is all.

heckingturtles: come lay down Alex

adotfiteme: okay

heckingturtles: I love you, dearest Alex.

adotfiteme: I love you too, John.

adotfiteme: can we watch something before we go to sleep?

heckingturtles: yeah.

.____.

Monday, 10:42am

alcoholism: yeah ofc what the fuck

bonbonhaggette: nothing could keep me from it, mon ami

aaronymous: i'll be there, that is if you want me there

macaronifucker: same

praying4death: rt

Elizard: yes ofc

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: s a m e

unsatisfied: lex we love you we're all coming

disneyownsme: ill be there

heckingturtles: okay thats good

alcoholism: wheres alex?

heckingturtles: still asleep, im making him food n stuff

macaronifucker: I didnt think hamilton slept this late.

bonbonhaguette: #johnsagoodboyf2k17

alcoholism: R T

Elizard: rt

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: rt

unsatisfied: rt

disneyownsme: rt

aaronymous: rt?

praying4death: rt

macaronifucker: dont understand but rt

heckingturtles: y a l l

.____.

"Revv em up"  
Monday, 1:32

adotfiteme: thanks you guys!!!! john is a great bf tbh

adotfiteme: GOOD SO NOW I CAN P L A N FUCK YEA

heckingturtles: dont bring a lot of alcohol

adotfiteme: BRING AS MUCH ALCOHOL AS YOU CAN

adotfiteme: wait peggy

alcoholism: FUCK YOU ALEX >>>: (

adotfiteme: >>>>>:( i dont want to be arrested because of YOUR irresponsibleness

alcoholism: NGNRNWNSMRM ill be o k a y youre more irresponsible than M E

adotfiteme: wotever u say

Elizard: ill bring the food and a load of water

adotfiteme: thanks liza

adotfiteme: IM SO READY HELL Y E A

alcoholism: then youll finally be able to legally drink

unsatisfied: exposed

adotfiteme: this is HARRASSMENT im calling the COPS

adotfiteme: BETRAYED JOHN IS LAUGHING AT ME

adotfiteme: MY OWN B O Y F R I E N D

bonbonhaguette: brb callin the cops

adotfiteme: RELATIONSHIP ENDED WITH JOHN NOW LAFAYETTE IS MY BOYFRIEND

disneyownsme: aye hes my boyfriend  
m  
heckingturtles: alex wait no i love u

adotfiteme: <<333333

alcoholism: THAT was a 180 holy fuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the explanation for not updating.
> 
> So for 1) I'm not much into Hamilton anymore, so I am not as motivated to write for the fandom as I was before? So Its Hard for me to. //I like writing for DEH rn, for example. I dont like writing for fandoms I'm not in, its really hard.
> 
> 2) I had an awful month last month. anxiety and suicidal thoughts, and i was scared this chapter would turn out badly if I tried to write it. I just got back from choir camp so im exhausted but I knew if I didnt write it now I'd never get it done, so I wrote. 
> 
> 3) I get scared how this will be percieved whenever I write it. I do that for every fic, but this being my only long running fic I fear its just going downhill fast, so Im scared and I want to keep t up hill.
> 
> I'm trying my best, guys. Im gonna try to finish this book, since I have the rest of it planned out. I really am sorry for the delay!! ;; Thank you for reading, regardless!! Love you all!!


	11. In Which Everything Goes to Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where its Alex's birthday, they get drunk, and Alex shares a little too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CONTENT WARNING CONTENT WARNING C O N T E N T W A R N I N G PLEASE READ THIS!
> 
> I marked this fic up because of this chapters themes. I didn't realize it was going to be this dark until I had written it out. So! HERES THE CONTENT WARNING-
> 
> -GRAPHIC SUICIDE ATTEMPT!! blease be careful  
> -panic attack!  
> -Mentioned Child Abuse  
> -Mentioned Abuse  
> -Mentioned Child Neglect  
> -the 'T' Slur  
> -derogatory terms in general
> 
> I'll leave a summary of the chapter in the end notes if youre uncomfortable! All of this happens at a specific point in the chapter to the end, so theres a line of astericks (cant spell : these things ****<) so if you wanna read the fluff but not the Heavy Content its there when you stop. Stay safe!

Saturday, 6:37am  
"Revv em up"

heckingturtles: ITS ALEXS BIRTHDAY YALL

heckingturtles: I AM A W A K E

aaronymous: someone's excited.

heckingturtles: he deserves to be happy and I am doing my best hes getting the best damn birthday ever

aaronymous: why are you even awake?

heckingturtles: going to the 24 hour ihop and getting breakfast because we have nothing here and he likes crepes

heckingturtles: why are /you/ up?

aaronymous: ,,,

aaronymous: i want to be.

heckingturtles: gee mysterious as ever burr

aaronymous: screw off laurens

heckingturtles: wow rude

heckingturtles: BURR WAS THAT YOU

aaronymous: I don't know wjat youre talking about.

heckingturtles: I JUST WITNESSED BURR TRY VAULT OVER A BENCH WITH WRAPPING PAPER IN HIS ARMS AND FACE PLANT INTO THE CONCRETE

aaronymous: SHHHSHHSHSHS SHUT UP

heckingturtles: THE TRUTH COME OUT

heckingturtles: AND HES OUT OF THE BUILDING

.___.

Saturday, 10:38am

alcoholism: I never thought I'd relate so much to the personality-less burr

aaronymous: youre attacking me and I will not approve

praying4death: in other news; aaron is bleeding

alcoholism: MFMENANDN WHY

aaronymous: i accidentally cut myself is all

praying4death: yeah cut yourself with the scissors trying to wrap a gift gdi

alcoholism: burr is clumsy what the fuck this is a new development

praying4death: more at nine

aaronymous: STOP it

adotfiteme: guys im G A Y

alcoholism: we know alex

adotfiteme: i want john to pound me like a fucking hamburger

adotfiteme: JOHN WHAT THE FUCK

heckingturtles: : )

unsatisfied: what the flying duck

alcoholism: dear sister, all ducks fly

unsatisfied: peggy i love you but i hate you

alcoholism: i love u i hate u i hate that i love you

unsatisfied: ,,,,,,,,,, g,,,ross

alcoholism: WAIT FUCK NO N O

Elizard: Happy birthday, Alex!!!!!

adotfiteme: ,,thanks liza

Elizard: <33333

disneyownsme: When the party @

adotfiteme: whenever ur all over

adotfiteme: perferably abt like 5 or 6? dk

adotfiteme: I needa shower

alcoholism: so you can wash the sin off

adotfiteme: yes.

bonbonhaguette: that is, how do you say, kinky

disneyownsme: darling no

adotfiteme: ;)

heckingturtles: ;)))

disneyownsme: i take that back

.____.

Saturday, 5:27pm

Elizard: we're on our way over!

Elizard: 'we're' meaning me, Peggy, and Angelica.

alcoholism: IM FINALLY COOL MOM ARE YOU PROUD

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: yes

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: Im on my way too!

aaronymous: me, james, and thomas carpooled. we're on our way.

adotfiteme: are you still bleeding due to your awful present wrapping skills

aaronymous: s t o p

.____.

The doorbell rang, and Alex jumped up to answer it. Alex didn't make it far, though, as his socks and the wooden floor didn't mix, and he fell on his face.

Alex heard laughing behind him, and he grumbled. "You'd think you'd know not to run with socks on, Alex."

"Shut up and answer the door, John."

John hurried to oblidge, the buzzer yelling with anticipation at quickening pace.

"Chill out," John opened the door to see the Schuyler sisters, Angelica, Eliza and Peggy, "buzzers going to die if you hit it that much." John laughed. Peggy saw the culprit, Peggy, scurry through under his arm, and saw Alex sitting on the ground, just laying there at that point.

"Hey Alex! Happy birthday, you shithead." Peggy sat on Alex, and he grunted.

"You're as heavy as i remember." Alexander shot as a joke, and Peggy fell off. "You HURT me. Im DEAD."

"Why am I the one who has to carry all the presents," Angelica huffed. John then grabbed them, and wobbled towards the coffee table and put the presents down.

"What did you bring?" John said. "Thats three presents, and I almost pulled my back out. If you bought a TV," John mumbled towards the end.

Alex got up off the floor, and was bombarded by the other two girls, who began to yell birthday wishes at him.

The door, still remaining opened, now held Lafayette and Hercules.

"Happy 21st, mon ami," Lafayette said, and Alex nodded. Lafayette pushed a present, oddly shaped like a wine bottle, into his hand. Alex smirked at Lafayette knowingly, and the two just stood there looking at eachother for a while before putting the presents down on the table. Hercules wrapped an arm around Lafayette, and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Most of the alcohol is still out in the car," Hercules said, "I'm gonna go grab it." He walked toward the door, before it being slammed in his face when the door unexpectly opened.

"OW WHAT THE FUCK" Hercules shouted, and Thomas Jefferson stood behind the opened door, laughing. Hercules groaned, and pushed passed Jefferson, Burr, and Madison. The three went to Alex and gave their presents to him, and Hercules went down the stairs to see Maria approaching up the stairs.

"Dude," She said, "you look like a door just hit you?" A thin, rectangular present sat in her arms. She wore a jacket over a tshirt, and jeans. She looked nice.

"One did." Hercules groaned, and went into his car and tried to grab the two wine bottles and one case of beer, but couldnt all at once. Maria lurked behind him. "Do you need help?" she said, and Hercules just grabbed the two wine bottles and handed it to her gratefully. "Thanks, Maria." He grabbed the beers.

"Its no problem!" She smiled, shifting the present so it wouldnt fall in her grasp.

"So what did you get him?" Hercules inquired, and she looked away and blushed.

"I got him a photo renewed and framed. Its nothing too big." Maria shrugged.

"That's pretty nice. I just got him a CD of a new thing him and John have been listening to. Its like a Percy Jackson musical." Hercules shrugged as well, the two beginning their trek up the stairs. "So how are you and Eliza doing?"

"I dont know what you mean," Maria blushed a deeper red. Hercules grinned more, but didn't push it.

He pushed the dorm door open. "I got alcohol! And Maria," He added as a note. Hercules heard inside whooping.

**********************************

  
By the time they were opening presents, they were all drunk. More than drunk, really.

Alex drunkenly thanked everyone for their presents- offhandedly remarking about his immigrancy when it came to Jefferson's gift. He had gotten him a notebook and a pen. Being drunk just loosened the (others would claim, little) control he had, especially if he was able to concieve he was around people he cared about.

But when it came to Maria's present, when he tore it open, tears began to stream down his face. "Ma-Maria," he looked up, "where did you get this?"

Being an emotional drunk didn't help either with his condition, so he began to rant.

"This is a picture of me, my biological brother and my mom and my biological father," Alex began, weeping slightly, "It was the last picture I had of them. I-I thought I lost it. I thought it was gone?" He looked at Maria confused, yet happy.

"He had it. Thats what w-we.." Maria looked away. Alex just hugged her, and she flinched for a moment, but hugged back. "Thank you so so much."

Jefferson, having no vocal control either when drunk, asked what had been on his mind for a while. "Why don't you see them anymore?" he slurred.

"My mom's dead," Alex weepily laughed, "She was holding me. We were both sick." Tears continued down his face. "My father and my brother could be in hell for all I care. They left me alone when I needed them most." Alex slurred, and Burr, Jefferson, and Madison sat in silence.

Suddenly, Madison broke the silence. "Who is 'he'?"

"The amazing shithead, James Reynolds. We were in a relationship with him." Alex began to ramble, and couldnt stop. "He like? Ruined my highschool years. I wish I could've moved further away from him but, what happens happens and I met you guys so its good i guess? He ruined a good scholarship though," Alex almost inhaled a cup of wine. They were nearing the bottom of the last bottle of wine, and all the beer was gone already. The room was quiet minus the lull of the CD player playing the disc they had gotten as a gift.

In the silence, Alex doesnt remember when he fell asleep.

.____.

Alex woke up first. His head was pounding, and he couldn't remember what had happened earlier that night. What he got for drinking blackout, he supposed. He caught the eye of the time- it was 2:34am. As expected. Alexander groaned and turned his head.

He looked at a framed picture, and a vague memory came back.

He was talking about it. He was talking about them. He was talking about everything.

Alex couldnt get up quick enough, and he ran to the bathroom. He felt sick from the quick standing up, and from the fear coursing through him.

What exactly did he say? What did he even say? He must have said everything, the fact that his mom's dead, he must have brought up how his brother and father evacuated without him in the hurricane. He must've brought up the awful adoption placements. He must have brought up everything about the Reynolds. He must have brought up he was trans. He must have brought up his scars from everything in his life, the hurricane, the placements, _James Reynolds-_

Alex puked into the toilet. He couldn't breathe, he felt like he was going to die. Everything was constricting against him, he felt stuck, _he couldnt get o u t-_

_Maybe you should just die. James's going to find you. He knows you told everything about what happened. He's going to kill you. You're doomed to die anyway. Theyre all going to leave you for dead like everyone has, because youre so fucked up. Then hes going to find you and kill you, just kill yourself before youre killed._

Alex didn't know when the medicine got into his hands. It was majorly pain killers. For his leg. He never finished. It was only 3 or 4. This wouldn't be enough.

_Its not like youre good enough for anything anyway. What are you going to do? Write about shit for the rest of your life and pretend thats going to get you through it? Youre going to end up under a bridge if you dont kill yourself now._

He finds John's perscription Xanax for his anxiety. Would this work?

_Youre useless. You hear?_

He grabs the acetometophen bottle, and poured it in his hands along with the other medicines.

_Whore's tranny daughter. Slut. Whore. Useless._

He took the cocktail of medicines and tried to wash it all down at once with water.

Alex doesnt remember what happened after that.

.____.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary:
> 
> -John is excited for Alex's Birthday and encounters Burr coming back from the store  
> -They all come over and have a dandy time  
> ***  
> -Alex gets a picture of his birth family from Maria  
> -Alex starts to spill about how his moms dead and that James Reynolds was a Bad Man (in a vague way)  
> -Alex wakes up later and vaguely remembers that he told everyone that but doesnt know how much he told (he thinks he has told everything)  
> -Alex has a panic attack and then tries to kill himself so he doesnt get killed
> 
> im so sorry yall i have another chapter written that may be posted tomorrow so you guys dont suffer
> 
> completely off topic: if you read the amount of words this fic currently has (11037) and know what im talking about I will love you forever


	12. In Which There's a Full Text Chapter™ and a Hospital Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where the author's productivity has spiked, and John is mad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOME CONTENT WARNINGS:  
> \- Angry People  
> \- sort of disassociation  
> \- Puke and Blood ™   
> \- talking about someones condition after suicide attempt
> 
> just be Prepared!!!  
> I think this qualifies as filler. idk.

John groaned and sat up after he heard a thunk. He heard something briefly before, but he didnt bother with it before, thinking someone just shifted or fell off the couch or something. But by the second, he knew someone was up, and that he better check on them. A pounding headache was in his head, and he groaned. He looked for Alex, but he wasn't where he fell asleep last.

Alex must've been the one to wake up, he thought. Something tugged him to go find where Alex was up, no matter if he felt like going back to sleep for a while more. He felt like something was wrong. He felt stressed.

John knew it had to just be his anxiety. But he got up nonetheless. He needed to take his medicine anyway, so he walked upstairs towards the bathroom.

John felt a scream come up in his throat and escape.

For infront of him, laid Alexander Hamilton in a puddle of his own puke and blood.

  
.____.

The rest woke up at John's scream, and wandered towards the stairs, and up them towards John's and Alex's room. Most of them were already naeseous from the hangover, but all of them tasted the puke in the back of their throat from the sight in front of them.

John wailed, and Lafayette ran over while Peggy puked their stomach out. Maria collapsed into a heap sobbing. Angelica ran out and began dialling 911.

The rest stood frozen, their bodies not catching up to their mind. Time was moving too fast, yet similitaneously too slow. Alex was dead, or dying, right in front of them. Alex, who was just so happy barely hours ago.

The time the ambulance rolled in was  
3:14am. John rode with him to the hospital, and the rest rode in Hercules's car, in a stiff silence as he sped faster down to the hospital where Alex was at what felt like years ago but only maybe 2 or 3 months ago.

Angelica looked down at her phone, and pulled up 'Momma Washington (Martha)' in her phone.

**Sunday, 3:17am**

**Me: Mrs. Washington?**

**Me: are you up?**

Angelica turned off her phone as the light blinded her and it was the only light source other than the streetlights that quickly came and went that lit up the crowded car.

Her phone lit up with a notification 5 minutes later.

_> >> Angelica's Phone_

_> Messaging (2)_  
From: Momma Washington  
-Hello Angelica. This is George. Martha is asleep, but I am awake.  
-What is up?

Angelica opened the messages.

**Me: Mr. Washington, please wake up Mrs. Washington, and go down to bellevue.**

**Momma Washington: Whats going on?**

**Me: Alexander...**

**Momma Washington: This is Martha, George has to drive. What did Alexander do?**

**Me: he overdosed.**

**Momma Washington: what?!**

Angelica cringed. It hurt to see how blunt that was.

**Me: we'll see you at the hospital. all of us are here.**

**Momma Washington: please stay safe.**

.____.

John was pacing in the waiting room of the hospital when they got there. Tears stained his face, and he looked like a mess. Blood and puke was on the front of his shirt and was stained on his pants knees.

"Anything on his condition?" Lafayette grimly said.

"Not fucking much," John grumbled, "they said 'he hit his head on the way down,' like no shit, I can see his head," Lafayette put a hand on Johns shoulder and looked him in the eyes. John hugged him tightly and sobbed. John didn't care that he was 'disturbing the guests'. There was only dumbasses who got a vibrator stuck in their ass there at this point, his boyfriend was in there on the verge of DEATH.

"Th-they're pumping his stomach right now," John said once he could talk again, "they said he should be okay." The party let out a collective sigh of relief.

"L- John," Jefferson mumbled in John's direction.

John's eyes snapped up. John wasn't as drunk as the rest, and could remember what went down better. Therefore, John was going to kill someone, that being...

"No. You dont get to call me that after this." John snapped. John wasn't just going to lay down and let them hurt his boyfriend. "You asked him personal shit that he didnt want to answer. Youre a piece of fucking shit," John growled, beginning to stalk towards them, but Lafayette held him back. "You shouldnt take advantage of someone who's DRUNK!" John tried to pull away from Lafayette.

"Taking advantage? I wasn't taking advantage of him! I was asking him questions I had-" Jeffersons eyes narrowed.

"He didn't want to say it sober!"

"Gu-Guys, please stop fighting," Maria whimpered, tears still falling.

"And you!" John hissed. "You got him the damned picture, you caused this-"

"John," a calm voice rang from behind them all, startling them, "thats certainly enough."

"Mr... Mr. Washington..." John murmured.

"Is my boy okay?" George said, acting like there was no tension in the room.

"I- err.. I... I. Believe. So." John gritted out, trying to calm down. He began to realize how out of line everything he just said was. It was true, he admitted, but now wasn't the time, they looked like they already felt bad...

"John." George grabbed Johns shoulder, bringing him back out of his mind, and John unconsiously flinched. George let go. "What did they say?"

"T-They um.. they said that they were pumping his stomach, to get the medicine out. He also hit his h-head falling down, a-and, t-they, the-ey, said he would be h-here for a few days." John breathed. George nodded, and said something else that John didn't really hear. Someone pulled him over to the chair and sat him down. It all felt underwater now, the touch and voices far away. Someone asked him a question, but he didn't answer, couldn't answer. John couldn't speak anymore, he was shutting down. He didn't notice how exhausted his body was until now, John freaking out still but the adrenaline was gone and he felt scared and empty at the same time. Everything was muted, but it scared him. But the scared feeling was also muted.

He would just relax. Just for a little bit. It would be okay.

Alex would be okay.

Alex would definitely be okay.

Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed!!!


	13. In Which Alex Awakens, and We're Back to Text Format

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Alex wakes up, Peggy sends memes, and apologies are issued.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope the rest of this doesnt sound too rushed. Ive written like 7000 words for this fic alone in the past week and im Suffering ™ 
> 
> the only tw i have for this chapter is  
> -implied past abuse  
> -implied past suicide attempt
> 
> BUT OTHERWISE WE'RE ALL GOOD

The doctors later gave them all a run down of Alex's condition. They said he should be up by no later the next evening, and he would have some permanent kidney damage. Alex had surprisingly no brain trauma from falling, but had some brain damage from the medicine. But, he would wake up and be able to move, and with some time walk. When Alex woke up, John and Mr. and Mrs. Washington were there. They passed him his phone, and he opened up his messanger app to see it full of get well texts. Alex couldn't decipher the meaning of them yet, so he just opened it to John's contact.

**Me: what?**

**John <333: You are in the hospital, Alex.**

**Me: Why?**

John took a minute to reply, looking at the Washingtons, but they just shook their head. Weird.

**John <333: You hurt yourself.**

**Me: Why?**

Alex knew somewhere he was being repetetive, but he didnt know what was going on. Being hooked up to an IV without knowing why is scary. He tried to sit up, but pain in his midsection made it impossible.

"Fuck!" the explicitive slipped out and Martha rushed over to him to tell him to lay back down.

Slowly, they told him what had happened.

.____.

_Alexander's Phone_

_Monday, 6:27pm_

_> >>Skype (50+ new messages!)_

.____.

Sunday, 7:47am

"Revv em Up"

aaronymous: I can't sleep.

alcoholism: I would find you cruel if you could in all honestly.

.____.

Sunday, 3:29pm

heckingturtles: i want to curl up with an enormous bowl of pasta and eat myself to death

macaronifucker: I ghostwrote this

heckingturtles: fuck off

alcoholism: could you chill out john

heckingturtles: i'm jjst so exhausted.

unsatisfied: have they said anything more about his condition?

heckingturtles: nothing much else.

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: hey um john

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: I'm really, really sorry. I didn't mean to cause all this by getting the photo. I am really truly sorry..

macaronifucker: yeah, I am sorry too. I wasn't thinking last night at all.

praying4death: nor was I, I'm really sorry,,

heckingturtles: I shouldntve placed all the blame on you. yeah, you sorta did bring the photo and bring it up but we didnt stop the talk from happening and didnt think. so im sorry too, i was just really, really really stressed and out of it for a while there. i didnt want him hurt.

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: oh, okay

macaronifucker: well i guess Hamilton will be alright at least

praying4death: yeah

heckingturtles: ... yeah.

.____.

Sunday, 9:59pm

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

alcoholism: ummm begone thot?

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

alcoholism: you woULD NOT BELIEVE YOUR E Y E S

_alcoholism sent a video to the chat._

alcoholism: pregnande

heckingturtles: peggy what are you doing

alcoholism: trying to make the chat a HAPPY PLACE BEFORE ALEX GETS BACK

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

alcoholism: //shot @ Maria/Eliza

Elizard: first of ALL HOW DARE YOU

Elizard: second of all: I CANT STOP LAUGHING

alcoholism: u would not believe ur bro if did u fall or did u let go

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: H E C K

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

_alcoholism sent a photo to the chat._

[11 messages hidden.]

.____.

Monday, 10:48am

alcoholism: I just came to see Alex to see a sleeping john carried out by the washingtons

Elizard: as in WE u shit

alcoholism: the schuyler peggys have gone to visit the alex

[7 hidden messages.]

.____.

Monday, 6:10pm

alcoholism: we're gonna go eat dinner ok

heckingturtles: okay

alcoholism: hIT U S U P IF SMTH HAPPENS.

heckingturtles: i definitely will.

macaronifucker: what he means by that is he'll let you be scared to death when youcome back

heckingturtles: nOoOoO,

macaronifucker: lies.

disneyownsme: guys im gay

macaronifucker: ?¿?????

alcoholism: we know this

disneyownsme: laf is asleep on me hes exhausted still

disneyownsme: and you think he would sleep like a rock on you and would drool

disneyownsme: but hes cute???? im dying

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: gayyyyyyyyy

disneyownsme: TRUE

adotfiteme: full homo

disneyownsme: ikr

disneyownsme: wait

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: ALE X!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

disneyownsme: HOLY FUCK YOURE HE R E

aaronymous: welc back hamilton

disneyownsme: ThIs Is LAF WE ARE HEADING TO THE HOSPITAL NOW

alcoholism: YOU WAKE UP RIGHT AGTER WE GO TO DINNER

alcoholism: WE'RE COMING BACK WE WERE GONNA JUST GET FAST FOOD ANYWAY

alcoholism: HOW LONG HAS HE BEEN UP WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME

heckingturtles: he woke up like 10 minutes ago

alcoholism: >>>>: (((((((((((

heckingturtles: you guys can go ahead and eat there tbh

heckingturtles: the doctors wanted to talk to him Alone ™

alcoholism: WE'RE ALREADY HALFWAY BACK

alcoholism: ITS TOO LATE WE HAVE COOKOUT

heckingturtles: you better have brought me smth

alcoholism: YOU BET UR A S S WE DID

disneyownsme: i just realized i forgot my own phone hecc

disneyownsme: WE'RE HERE

heckingturtles: how D A R E you only buy me f r i e s

alcoholism: WELL U SHOULDVE TOLD US YOH WANTED SOMETHING

adotfiteme: im back @ u guys

adotfiteme: my head and throat Hurts ™ so can we just text????

heckingturtles: yea ofc hon!!!!

alcoholism: no im gonna SCREAM as soon as i get in there ofc we can be quiet lex we love u

unsatisfied: no offense but you look like shit

adotfiteme: i feel worse than i look

disneyownsme: f e e l be t t e r you s h i t

adotfiteme: >>>: (((

disneyownsme: what did they talk to you about mon ami?

adotfiteme: the psychologist came over and safety checked me and decided i didnt need to be put into a psychiatric hospital basically. she told me to go to the campus therapist though. make sure im okay and stuff. i'll be at home like by thursday, and starting some pt on next monday because the Problem With Brain Trauma is u kno.

disneyownsme: /are/ you okay?

adotfiteme: i dont know. i think so. physically im hurting but i wont die.

disneyownsme: okay...

disneyownsme: I hate to go but, i have an early class tomorrow and Laf and I haven't eaten yet,,

adotfiteme: no its good, get some rest okay

disneyownsme: I'll come around after class tomorrow? okay?

disneyownsme: and I'll ride with him here tomorrow -laf

adotfiteme: you dont have to, i might want to rest tomorrow

disneyownsme: just hmu when or if you want us to come over! ok?

adotfiteme: mhm

disneyownsme: well we'll still be in the chat so we're There In Spirit

adotfiteme: Dearest John

heckingturtles: yes, my Dearest??

adotfiteme: i hear you have fries

adotfiteme: g i v e

heckingturtles: theres only like a few left

adotfiteme: g i v e

heckingturtles: what if they upset your stomach

adotfiteme: g. i. v. e. please

heckingturtles: okay fine

adotfiteme: ilu

heckingturtles: u2

alcoholism: like that itunes band gross

heckingturtles: H E C C no

[172 hidden messages]

Monday, 7:57pm

alcoholism: fucc they called us out we gotta go now

unsatisfied: we love you alex take care!

heckingturtles: mmmmmmaaaaaaaaa can I visit you tomorrow like anyt ime

adotfiteme: sure why not

Elizard: and w e cant visit im hurt

Elizard: no no im just kidding really like seriously it doesnt matter just take your time getting better okay??? please be careful.

adotfiteme: mhm, love you guys too

.____.

Monday, 8:01pm

_asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw >>> adotfiteme_

adotfiteme: hold up dont go

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: but visiting hours are over

adotfiteme: i need to talk to u alone ill take resp if smth goes wrong

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: okay,,,

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: is it about,,,, yknow

adotfiteme: mhm

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: do you know what happened?

adotfiteme: i think i remember slightly. and its sort of freaking me out.

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: if it doesnt cause you any harm, can you tell me?? of course if it does you dont have to say.

adotfiteme: what did i say about everything that night

adotfiteme: because i sort of um woke up and freaked out because i didnt remember what i said but i knew i said something about it and everytjing and

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: shh alex, im here. calm down. its gonna be okay.

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: you just said he was shitty and ruined a scholarship. you didnt say much else other than that.

adotfiteme: so he isnt

adotfiteme: gonna kill me

adotfiteme: right?

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: alex he isnt going to come after you

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: hes in prison, and none of us, much less me or john, or Mr. and Mrs. Washington, will let him touch you.

adotfiteme: I know its hard for me to ask with this dumb IV in my arm

adotfiteme: but could you like come over and hug me?

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: yeah ofc

adotfiteme: thank you

adotfiteme: you should go so you wont get in too much trouble

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: yeah okay

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: im always a phone call away? if you need me

adotfiteme: you really dont need to smother me, i think. ill be okay.

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: dont stare at your phone for too long. ive heard horror stories after some brain trauma some people develop epilepsy

adotfiteme: way to calm my anxiety

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: sorry!!

adotfiteme: no its good. ill text you if i need it ok?

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: okay. good night alex

adotfiteme: good night maria

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: alex?

adotfiteme: you left like five mins ago what is it

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: nvm nvm

adotfiteme: no wait

adotfiteme: continue

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: I'm really sorry. about getting you the picture and causing all of this.

adotfiteme: this wasnt your fault maria??? honestly the picture was my favourite present i got. so thank you so so much for it.

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: oh. ok. i was hoping you'd like it? i just feel bad about everything, yeah

adotfiteme: dont feel bad

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: okay. for real now, gn alex

adotfiteme: gn

.____.

_macaronifucker >>> adotfiteme_

macaronifucker: Hamilton, I am so sorry about pushing you over details of your childhood. I know you were drunk and I shouldntve done that

adotfiteme: me? getting an apology from jefferson? once in a life time oppertunity.

macaronifucker: wow i try 2 do smth nice

adotfiteme: im just. kidding. I accept your apology. Its just that I dont like talking about it that much but yknow you guys were gonna find out anyway. I'd been meaning to tell you guys, anyway. all my friends end up finding out somehow lmao

macaronifucker: are we... friends?

adotfiteme: i mean i guess

adotfiteme: if you wanna be

macaronifucker: ,,,

macaronifucker: i'd like to be friends

adotfiteme: thanks, me too

adotfiteme: I want some sleep. gn

macaronifucker: gn hammy

adotfiteme: hammy?

macaronifucker: im trying out smth

adotfiteme: well, then, gn jeffy.

macaronifucker: u kno

macaronifucker: i guess later we'll figure it out.

adotfiteme: yeah later.

.____.

_praying4death >>> adotfiteme_

praying4death: Hamilton?

adotfiteme: everyone keeps on interrupting my SLEEP

adotfiteme: what is it?

praying4death: i can tell you later

adotfiteme: just tell me

praying4death: i'm sorry for asking who 'he' was. I shouldve like known sorry like im really sorry

adotfiteme: everyones apologizing tonight jfc lmao

adotfiteme: its fine. i accept. but i do have a question

praying4death: yea?

adotfiteme: what exactly did i say about. him?

praying4death: you basically said he was a bad man. You didnt specify and its okay that you didnt like specify!

adotfiteme: oh. okay.

adotfiteme: thanks for telling me

praying4death: its no problem.

adotfiteme: im going to sleep now, good night

praying4death: good night Hamilton

adotfiteme: can you just call me my first name? Hamilton is a good last name and i love it but I prefer Alexander. Its my name anyway.

praying4death: okay, Alexander,,

adotfiteme: good night Madison.

praying4death: will you call me by my first name?

adotfiteme: i dont really want to.

praying4death: oh! right right sorry sorry i did it again

adotfiteme: calm down, its okay

praying4death: you can call me any form of my last name!

praying4death: like Mads!

praying4death: or Maddie!

praying4death: or m-dog or smth

adotfiteme: pfft, mads is fine.

adotfiteme: good night, mads.

praying4death: yes, good night alexander!

.____.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: *has another chapter ready then I just have two more chapters to write!*  
> me: *exhausted*  
> me: fucc
> 
> ALSO!!! THANK YOU GUYS FOR OVER 2000 HITS??? AND NEARLY 200 KUDOS IM YELLIN


	14. In Which Its a Happy Recovery Chapter :0

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Alex and Thomas cant pick names for eachother, Alex stays at the Washingtons for a while, and Alex just wants to get some work done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I CANT BELIEVE ONLY TWO MORE AFTER THIS YELLIN
> 
> heres my biggest fluff ever 
> 
> (not rlly but here ;0)

Thursday, 10:49am  
"Revv Em Up"

adotfiteme: IM SUFFERING

heckingturtles: I DIDNT MEAN TO RUN OVER A B U M P IM SORRYYYYY

adotfiteme: im dying john is an irresponsible parent

adotfiteme: I'm calling the police

adotfiteme: oh and also

_adotfiteme added washingmom & washingdad_

adotfiteme: they wanted me to add them back

macaronifucker: hows your daddy ; )

heckingturtles: im fine.

macaronifucker: HOLYSHIT

adotfiteme: BABE N O

heckingturtles: ; )))))))))))

washingmom: hello children,

macaronifucker: wait fuck

adotfiteme: h e y martha

adotfiteme: im goin home : D

washingmom: visit us more will you?

adotfiteme: eventually

adotfiteme: IM IN THE CA R

  
heckingturtles: vroom vroom get out of me car

adotfiteme: WHY R WE @ THE WASHINGTONS

heckingturtles: Mrs. Washington told me she wanted you to stay here during your bedrest period and that you could come back to the dorm on monday

adotfiteme: TOP TEN ANIME BETRAYALS

heckingturtles: ILL BE HERE ALMOST ALWAYS

adotfiteme: u have a class today

heckingturtles: WHICH IS WHY ILL BE BACK

adotfiteme: pffff >: (

adotfiteme: f u c jkkkkkk i have so much W O R K i need to do

disneyownsme: but youre not doing it now

adotfiteme: whos saying im not

disneyownsme: i am

adotfiteme: f i g h t m e

adotfiteme: HOW ARE YOU AT THE DOOR

disneyownsme: I was on my way

bonbonhaguette: he told me not to text

adotfiteme: MCPLEASE NO

bonbonhaguette: we have many gifts for you mon ami ; )

adotfiteme: DID YOU REALLY BRING ME STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE FROM THE BAKERY

bonbonhaguette: o u i

adotfiteme: I LOVE YOU GUYS

.____.

Thursday, 3:57pm

macaronifucker: ja m i e

praying4death: wh a t

macaronifucker: blease bring me kfc mac and cheese

macaronifucker: i am IN NEED OF COMFORT

praying4death: omw

adotfiteme: whats up jeffery

macaronifucker: projects, hamilham.

adotfiteme: jeef

macaronifucker: hilton

adotfiteme: thomass

macaronifucker: lexander

adotfiteme: shithead

macaronifucker: fuckwad

[52 hidden messages]

alcoholism: my name jeff

macaronifucker: first of all FUCK YOU

alcoholism: thats pedophilia ; )

macaronifucker: i ha t e you

alcoholism: ; )

.____.

Thursday, 8:35pm

adotfiteme: can I have PAIN MEDS

heckingturtles: no

adotfiteme: BUT JOHHHNNNNNN IT HUUURRRTTTTSSSSSSSS

heckingturtles: ill get a h e a t ing padd

adotfiteme: PPPLLLLEEASSSEEEE IM SUFFFERRRINNNG

heckingturtles: n o

adotfiteme: this is a betrayal i cant believe this

.____.

Friday, 12:06am

adotfiteme: the pain. causes me to not sleep

heckingturtles: ITS UR FAULT FOR THROWING THE HEATING PAD

adotfiteme: IT BURNT MY S K I N IM B U R N E D

heckingturtles: dear it was just hot

washingmom: there should be some rice in the cabinet, put some into a bag for now John

washingmom: George will go out to buy a heating pad tomorrow

washingdad: why me?

washingmom: because you dont have a class to teach tomorrow

washingdad: but

washingdad: f i n e :/

macaronifucker: trouble in domesti-land

macaronifucker: WAIT

macaronifucker: I DDINT REALIZE THAT WAS YOU MR WASHINGTON SORRY

adotfiteme: "george will"

macaronifucker: shut up alexslander

adotfiteme: fight me

macaronifucker: k

washingdad: please do not fight with my healing son

adotfiteme: i a m n o t y o u r s o n b l e a s e

washingdad: k then, son

adotfiteme: >:/

alcoholism: top ten anime fights

unsatisfied: MAGARITA SCHUYLER WHY R U UP

alcoholism: why are YOU up

unsatisfied: ,,, touche

Elizard: things are wild rn

aaronymous: its lit, fam

alcoholism: unfollowed, blocked, uninvited from my 10th birthday party

adotfiteme sent a photo to the chat.

adotfiteme: how italians suffer in pain

alcoholism: THE CORRECT USAGE OF A MEME

adotfiteme: //shots fired

adotfiteme: ////like @ harambe

alcoholism: NO STALE MEMES IN MY HOUSEHOLD OUT

adotfiteme: is everyone up like literally

macaronifucker: Jamie isnt up

praying4death: well actually

macaronifucker: YOU TOLD ME 5 MINUTES AGO YOU WERE GOING TO SLEEP

macaronifucker: you LIED

praying4death: im literally laying right next to you, how did you not realize

macaronifucker: i,,, have tunnel vision

adotfiteme: everyones up holy shit

adotfiteme: ITS USUALLY ME UP AT THIS UNGODLY HOUR ONLY

macaronifucker: what

adotfiteme: i never said i was COHERENT at this hour, jerkofferson

macaronifucker: honestly what the fuck

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: i was neglected in this and im honestly hurt

adotfiteme: MARIA I DIDNT REALIZE

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: no its ok

Elizard: do you want me to comfort you Mari

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: yeah ;-;

adotfiteme: IM SORRYYYY

alcoholism: isnt the first time hes forgotten someone

adotfiteme: STOP CALLING ME OUT LIKE THIS DUDE???

Elizard: *wipes ur tears away* be happy

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: '-'

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: the tears they are gone

alcoholism: thats GAY

Elizard: MFNNRNEJSKK

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: YELLS We're not dating??????????¿

alcoholism: ;)

alcoholism: anyway isnt that DEH thing??? coming up soon???

Elizard: in like less than 3 weeks??? BC YES!!!

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: e x c i t e m e n t

Elizard: Its like so exciting?????????? fuccccccccc

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: ive been waiting for this

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: for forever

Elizard: AYYYYYYYYY

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: A YYY

alcoholism: n e r d s

.____.

Monday, 1:00pm

Elizard: Im coming over to ur place alex i havent gotten to smother you yet

adotfiteme: im sUFFERIG MORE NOW DONT APPROACH M E

Elizard: im comING OVER WITH STRAWBERRY ICECREAM

adotfiteme: my savior??? come here

heckingturtles: so SHES allowed to approach you

adotfiteme: shes not the one who made me hit my head on the DORMS DOOR

heckingturtles: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT AND I SAID SORRY

adotfiteme: >>>>>>: (((((((

heckingturtles: im s o r r y

Elizard: r u ok alex?

adotfiteme: yea im good i didnt hit it hard

heckingturtles: whY R U STILL MAD AT ME : (((

adotfiteme: bc fuk u

heckingturtles: :,(((((((

adotfiteme: john i have a secret

heckingturtles: ?

adotfiteme: i dont actually hate u

heckingturtles: : DDDD

adotfiteme: i despise u.

heckingturtles: DDDDD :

adotfiteme: (im just kidding btw)

heckingturtles: (i know b)

alcoholism: a healthy relationship

Elizard: btw how long did they say PT would be 4??

adotfiteme: they said 2 times a week for a month then we'd figure out from then mfmffffffff

adotfiteme: when will i have time to WORK

Elizard: l a t e r

adotfiteme: im SUFFERINN m O R E

._____.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hah gAYYYYY
> 
> (thanks for over 200 kudos!)


	15. In Which Maria and Eliza go to See Dear Evan Hansen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where the Girls see DEH, and John and Alex are About ™

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: this is set on February 1st-- so a 2-3 week time skip.
> 
> therefore, alex is a lot better than he was before!
> 
> Ive been distracted all day so i couldnt get this up lmao
> 
> hope you enjoy!
> 
> (also I enjoy irony so if u kno wot im talkin abt >: ))

Wednesday, 1:06pm

_adotfiteme added alcoholism, aaronymous, disneyownsme, heckingturtles, honhonbagette, macaronifucker, praying4death & unsatisfied_

_adotfiteme changed the chat name to "Operation Marliza"_

adotfiteme: I know we had an old chat once upon a time but I dont know where it is and I wanted to add jeffs mads and burrs

aaronymous: burrs

adotfiteme: idk what to call you

aaronymous: you can call me aaron ykno

adotfiteme: no im gonna call you ay ay ron there we go

aaronymous: i hate you alexander.

adotfiteme: bite me ay ay ron.

adotfiteme: ANYWAY SO MARIA AND ELIZA ARE GETTING READY ????? ME AND JOHN ARE HELPING MARIA AND INTEL TELLS ME ELIZAS GETTING READY TOO

alcoholism: im intel

macaronifucker: hey intel

alcoholism: hoe dont do it

macaronifucker: im dad

alcoholism: oh my god

adotfiteme: a n y w a y

adotfiteme: WHO WANTS TO JOIN ME AND JOHN IN WATCHING OVER THEM

unsatisfied: are you sure you should alex???? youre not supposed to be up and walking for way too long

adotfiteme: ill tell john to take me home if it gets to be too much ok angie chill

unsatisfied: i have to be the mom friend when elizas not around for you >>:/

adotfiteme: i k n o w but p l s

.____.

Wednesday, 3:02pm  
"Revv em up"

Elizard: so we're on our way!!!

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: phones: off  
attention: paid  
tissues: out  
I am allowed to watched DEH

alcoholism: thats a dead meme and the incorrect usage of it

Elizard: peggy!!

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: fite me, peggy

adotfiteme: F I G H T F I G H T F I G H T

._____.

"Operation Marliza"

adotfiteme: me and john are just gonna chill @ the starbucks down the street

aaronymous: wouldnt that look. suspicious

heckingturtles: as a former barista i can confirm we do not care who is in the shop for how long as long as youre not disturbing the peace or its After Hours ™

adotfiteme: so Y E A H here we GO

alcoholism: im joining

adotfiteme: peggy, the only reason youre on is because you stayed home today because youre sic

alcoholism: SOOOO?????

heckingturtles: stay @ home

alcoholism: damn you guys

._____.

Wednesday, 6:27pm  
"Revv Em Up"

Elizard: I AM RUINED IS ALL IM GONNA SAY

unsatisfied: u ok ???

Elizard: NO NO NOT LIKE THAT IT WAS REALLY GOOD

alcoholism: u guys aren't gonna stage door???

Elizard: nah, for one, its a wednesday matinee they still have another show tonight, and two, me and mari dont really like the crowd so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

alcoholism: seems legit

Elizard: okay so we might not be on we're going out to dinner

unsatisfied: ok take your time!

alcoholism: dont forget the gay

Elizard: mtmrnaj

.____.

"Operation Marliza"

heckingturtles: "dinner" WALKS RIGHT INTO THE STARBUCKS IM YELLING

adotfiteme sent a photo to the chat.

adotfiteme: WE ARE SAFELY HIDDEN FROM THEM

adotfiteme: but we have a clear view of them >>: 0

macaronifucker: the plot thickens

adotfiteme: omg theyre gay theyre trying not to show

adotfiteme: LET OUT YOUR RAINBOW COLOURS

heckingturtles: holy shit

adotfiteme: h o l y f u c k

unsatisfied: what happened???

adotfiteme: THEY KISSED THIS IS NOT A DRILL THEY JUST KISS E D

alcoholism: PICS OR IT DIDNT HAPPEN????

adotfiteme: I DONT HAVE A PIC BUT THEYRE HOLDING HANDS

alcoholism: P I C S

_adotfiteme sent a photo to the chat._

_adotfiteme sent a photo to the chat._

unsatisfied: THATS MY BABY SISTER

disneyownsme: now thats what you call

disneyownsme: G A Y

praying4death: congrats 4 them!!!

aaronymous: i have a dumb question

aaronymous: havent they kissed before

adotfiteme: wow ay ay ron telling us before he says something that its dumb 4 once

adotfiteme: lmao jk

adotfiteme: this is the first time theyre both sober?

aaronymous: oh right

alcoholism: IM GAY FOR THEIR GAY

alcoholism: SHES THE FIRST ONE OF US TO GET HITCHED IM CRYIN

_adotfiteme sent a photo to the chat._

adotfiteme: tHEYRETALKINGABTSMTH

.____.

_adotfiteme >>> heckingturtles_

adotfiteme: um

heckingturtles: yea?

adotfiteme: after they leave can we like get back to the dorm or the washingtons fast im sorta Hurting ™

heckingturtles: ok!!!

adotfiteme: thnx

.____.

"Operation Marliza"

_adotfiteme sent a video to the chat._

adotfiteme: THIS IS GAY

alcoholism: i cant hear anything other than the shitty electropop

heckingturtles: it is NOT shitty,,,,,,,,,,

alcoholism: call out post for John Laurens: -likes the Chainsmokers

heckingturtles: im being at t a c k e d,,,,,,,,

bonbonhaguette: maybe what happens when you have,,, how do you say,,,, awful music tastes

heckingturtles: EVEN MY D E A R E S T F R I E N D

adotfiteme: no offense but theres better out there

heckingturtles: M Y B O Y F R I E N D

._____.

Wednesday, 7:02pm  
"Revv em up"

Elizard: g uys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

adotfiteme: waddup

Elizard sent a photo to the chat.

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw sent a photo to the chat.

Elizard: we,,,re

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: dating?????

alcoholism: FINALLY

adotfiteme: !!! ! ! CONGRATS!!!!!!

bonbonhaguette: Congratulations!!!!! !!!

macaronifucker: hah GAY

macaronifucker: (congrats u gays)

aaronymous: congrats!

unsatisfied: MY BABY SISTER ! ! !!!!!!!

heckingturtles: IM SO PROUD OF MY DAUGHTERS

praying4death: IM SO???? CONGRATs !

disneyownsme: use protection ; )

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: WHAT NO

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: WAIT I DONT MEAN NOT USE PROTECTION. (do we need to? fuckkdkdkeme)

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: what i mean is not ye,,,t or in the near future

Elizard: we've talked it all over making sure everythings omay and what we can and cant do!!!

adotfiteme: relationship goals

unsatisfied: rt

alcoholism: rt

heckingturtles: :,,((((

adotfiteme: (im not saying ur a bad bf b,)

heckingturtles: (i k)

adotfiteme: (ilu)

heckingturtles: (ilu2)

.____.

"Operation Marliza"

_adotfiteme changed the chat title to "Operation Marliza: Complete"_

adotfiteme: WE DID IT GUYS

heckingturtles: i guess we have to go home

alcoholism: from that moment on everyone knew the presidents head could explode at any moment

aaronymous: I was thinking the same thing wtf

alcoholism: LIES

heckingturtles: WHAT

alcoholism: only the BEST memes

.____.

"Revv em up"

Elizard: John,,, Alex,,, was that you,,,,

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: and theyre GONE

.____.

_Elizard >>> asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw_

Elizard: I really, Really had a good time

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: i did to???

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: so,,,, when would you,,, like to,,, do this again

Elizard: I actually was going to ask you that

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: oh,,, so um.

Elizard: how about next friday you come over and we can? just hang out?

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: Im taking you out to dinner b4 tho

Elizard: Mari,,,

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: im doIN if

Elizard: ok. where then?

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: mmmmmmmmmmmmm the steak and shake?

Elizard: ok!!!!!!!

._____.

Thursday, 1:46am  
"Revv em Up"

heckingturtles: I wish I was a tree

heckingturtles: then I could actually be loved

heckingturtles: //shot

heckingturtles: no but really???? they have so many companions

heckingturtles: and actually have a purpose on this Earth

Elizard: Evan Hansen ghostwrote this

.____.

_adotfiteme >>> heckingturtles_

adotfiteme: cmere

adotfiteme: you know I love you right?

heckingturtles: yeah i knoe but just

heckingturtles: nenenshejahhhhhhh

adotfiteme: shhh its okay

adotfiteme: wanna. watch like. idk parks and rec?

heckingturtles: we ca n

adotfiteme: Im getting you some food

heckingturtles: alex!!!

adotfiteme: just relax!!!!!!!!!! im here for u

heckingturtles: im here 4 u too

adotfiteme: I love you

heckingturtles: I love you too.

._____.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im suffering ive had to post this thrice
> 
> and ???? im not really thinking this is my best work. theres like so manuthings i couldve done mtmwmahrhej
> 
> and im sorry if maria and eliza seem rushed its just. i dont do pining well and i couldnt find a good way to fit it in with everything else???4'wnsnrmwmmw
> 
> and also like i couldve done alexs recovery time. but I literally couldnt think of wnything. literally there was only onenthing in could think of and it wasnt good enough so. also the little may seem ooc bit was discussed during the healling period im sorrymfmmmmmmm
> 
> (also the author does not hate the chainsmokers himself i meant no harm if u like em!)
> 
> (honestly i dont remember writing half of this chapter. #disassociationisthebestlmao)
> 
> hope you enjoyed???? anywayyy!!!
> 
> 1 more chapter--- idk if itll come out tomorrow but it may so?)?


	16. In Which Its the LAST CHAPTER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where they all watch a movie, and go to eat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE LAST CHAPTEr!!!!! aAAAAAA (i didnt know how to end it well. lmao)

Thursday, 3:31pm  
_adotfiteme >>> asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw_

adotfiteme: how r u and Eliza doin ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: we!!! are happy

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: also like seriously were you and john stalking us

adotfiteme: ,,,y,,,es

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: ? why???

adotfiteme: I wanted to KNOW

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: youre extra alex

adotfiteme: yea B) extra cool

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: you would not believe your knees if I saw a million trees

adotfiteme: wHAT

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: THATWASMEANTFORELIZA

adotfiteme: HOLY S H IT

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: IM SENDING THIS TO THE CHAT

.____.

Thursday, 3:43pm  
"Revv em Up"

_asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw sent a photo to the chat_

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: evan hansen is real and he told me to write this

Elizard: HOLYSHIT

alcoholism: I LOVE FIREFLIES MEMES

alcoholism: also Alex you are Not Cool

adotfiteme: yes i am B /////////

macaronifucker: you really Are Not

adotfiteme: Im being bullied im telling all your moms

.____.

Thursday, 4:46pm

adotfiteme: GUYS GUYS CAN WE ALL GO OUT TO EAT????????????

heckingturtles: im in

bonbonhaguette: to where?

adotfiteme: ummmmmmmmmmmmm huddle house?

bonbonhaguette: im in

bonbonhaguette: et tu, mon coeur?

disneyownsme: sure mdudes

praying4death: me and thomas are in!! his phone is dead

aaronymous: ill be there ™

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: yeah ofc!

elizard: all of us r in

adotfiteme: HELL YEAH MEET @ 5:30

alcoholism: that is like 45 minutes from now wyd

adotfiteme: SOME OF US HAVE BEEN UN ABLE TO EAT TODAY >>>>>>>: (((((((((((((((((

heckingturtles: YOURE THE ONE WHO WOULDNT EAT AFTER YOUR APPOINTMENT >> : (

adotfiteme: i have WORK darling i missed a LONG TIME

aaronymous: youve almost completely caught up, alexander

adotfiteme: hecc off ay ay ron

._____.

Thursday, 5:31pm

adotfiteme: you guys are all late >: (((

macaronifucker: youre not even here yet

adotfiteme: pshhhh yeah i am fkekandhejjwm

adotfiteme: a l e x makes an e n t r a n c e

macaronifucker: my god youre so extra

_praying4death sent a photo to the chat_

praykng4death: the ladies FACE

adotfiteme: SHE JUST LOOKED AT ME AND STUTTERED "g-give us a minute sir!"

heckingturtles: "just 4?" "no, 11."

adotfiteme: IN LAUGHING A MALE WAITER JUST PASSED ME AND MUMBLES: PEOPLE MAKE RESERVATIONS FOR A REASON

adotfiteme: THIS IS A HUDDLE HOSUE IM CRYI NG

Elizard: we met up with Maria! so we are + 4 lmao

adotfiteme: I dont think Angelica would like you having sex in her car

Elizard: WE'RE TAKING A CAB

adotfiteme: i dont think the car driver would enjoy you having sex in the back of his cab*

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: imMA BEAT YOU UP ONCE WE GET THERE

Elizard: we are NOT havinng sex

alcoholism: can confirm, theyre just making out back here

Elizard: P E G G Y !

alcoholism: //sweats//

alcoholism: theyre just homosexually holding hands dont worry

Elizard: "homosexually" the lit majors are crying

praying4death: rt

adotfiteme: can confirm

macaronifucker: what are you majoring in anyway

aaronymous: i think polisci

adotfiteme: undeclared

aaronymous: oh

adotfiteme: well i have declared a place holder in polisci but i might just take up literature ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ maybe both im taking classes for both

aaronymous: oh

aaronymous: im here

alcoholism: i cant believe you text and drive, burr /:

aaronymous: i dont!!!!!!

aaronymous: i walked

alcoholism: sure >::: ((((((

alcoholism: howd u get here before us then >>>: ((((((((

alcoholism: wait the cab drivers forcing me out brb

adotfiteme: now who are we missing

heckingturtles: laf and herc

alcoholism: ; ))))

disneyownsme: peggy s t o pppppp

disneyownsme: we're here now

adotfiteme: ims o hunnggrryyyy lets e a t

._____

Thursday, 7:01pm

heckingturtles: the waiters hate us omg

bonbonhaguette: theyre giving us the stink eye omg

aaronymous: i guess we're all going then

praying4death: wait a minute

praying4death: i have a movie i wanna watch. can we all watch it together??

praying4death: we just need somewhere with a smart tv

adotfiteme: we have a smart tv

 

adotfiteme: oh wait

washingmom: We have a smart TV, why dont you all come over? I'm sure George would like to see you all!

washingdad: I'm actually trying to sleep

washingdad: You all are allowed to come over here, I mean.

bonbonhaguette: martha is a killer

 

Elizard: i miss you mari,,, : (

asingledistantbutveryloudyeehaw: i cant believe we got separated in the cabs

aaronymous: i told you guys we should take a bus

adotfiteme: >>>: (((((

adotfiteme: anyway, whats the movie called Mads?

praying4death: its called koe no katachi

praying4death: A Silent Voice i mean

alcoholism: w e e b

praying4death: shut up

adotfiteme: it sounds good lets watch it

adotfiteme: we're gonna watch the heathers bootleg after

praying4death: ok !

washingmom: please do refrain from giving our TV a virus, though

adotfiteme: we wo nnttt

._____.

Thursday, 8:24pm

macaronifucker: ew its subbed

praying4death: honestly, fight me, thomas

._____.

Thursday, 9:25pm

adotfiteme: IM GONNA FIGHT UEBITCH

adotfiteme: and to a lesser degree: Shoyo as a kid

praying4death: mfmfmfmfffff relatable

.____.

Thursday, 9:56pm

bonbonhaguette: that was really good

praying4death: !!!!

adotfiteme: it really was omfmfmrj

adotfiteme: onto the BOOT

.____.

Thursday, 10:02pm

macaronifucker: the quality is horrible

adotfiteme: fuck off thom-ass

macaronifucker: alexslander

.____.

Thursday, 11:58pm

_washingmom sent a photo to the chat._

_washingmom sent a photo to the chat._

Friday, 12:00am

washingmom: i thought you guys might want some of these pictures. in the morning. for blackmail, or whatever you call it.

washingmom: gosh, its late. im going to bed.

**[washingmom: I'll make breakfast in the morning. Its going to be a new day, so you'll have to be ready, right?**

**washingmom: new adventures that you probably wont need or want a parent for. things that you all will experience on your own.**

**washingmom: youll need eachother though. its important that you have eachother.**

**washingmom: the adventures that will come are unforseeable. youll need friends to help you up if you are knocked down.**

**washingmom: but you will get up, and itll be okay.**

**washingmom: each adventure you go on, you learn. you grow stronger. so always adventure forward.**

**washingmom: i wont be here for these adventures, probably. so you need to just... i dont know.**

**washingmom: god, i dont know where this is coming from. im pretty tired.**

**washingmom: im going to bed.]**

._____.

**[DELETE THE SELECTED MESSAGES?]**

**[YES]** [NO]

**[MESSAGES DELETED.]**

._____.

Friday, 12:05am

washingmom: Also, Alex. The tv. It has a virus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (also as a note: I dont remember if i announced any of their ? majors??? emmmmjjj)
> 
> Its been a RIDE ™ thanks for joining me! I'll be around!!! thank you for putting up with me!! And hope you guys will be happy!!!!!! w this and im so glad you read and thank you for reading!!!!!!!!!


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